Looking from the Outside In
by MorphyMorpheus
Summary: [Discontinued, at least for now. Something of an old shame, but I haven't reread it recently enough to say for sure.]
1. Hibari Kyoya

**I only own my OC(s).**

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_**Chapter 1:**_ Hibari Kyoya

We all know how most OC stories in the KHR fandom start, right? European/American/mixed-origin girl with ties to the mafia transfers to Namimori and miraculously manages to hit it off with one of the guys? Yeah, those kind of stories.

This isn't one of those stories.

Lisa, an Italian girl, has recently moved to Namimori. Sounds generic so far, right? This is where similarities end.

Our view-point character may look the part of a pre-teen, but in reality she's a proud 25-year-old woman. Honestly, what kind of illusionist would she be if she couldn't even change her appearance? Though, if we're being technical, she isn't much of an illusionist; having the Mist Flame and basic knowledge of how to use it was simply convenient for her job."

Said job?

Field Psychologist.

You see, reader, Lisa's work isn't all that different from the average therapist. She just happens to add stalking her subjects to the job description.

A little while ago, she'd scored this wonderfully well-paying job; analyzing the future Vongola Decimo and those he associates with in order to find ways to help them grow as people.

And so the stalking began. If only she knew beforehand what a dysfunctional bunch these kids were…

* * *

Why exactly did she decide it was a good idea to start with the Cloud Guardian, again?

Watching him go about his daily routine certainly wasn't boring, she'll give him that, but it was most definitely infuriating.

For someone so keen on 'keeping the peace', he sure broke a lot of rules. Why is he the only one allowed to carry a weapon on school grounds? Why are he and his goons allowed to beat people up? Why does he dislike people 'crowding'? Does he not realize how flawed his system is or does he simply not care?

After a lot of thinking (and stalking), Lisa may finally have an answer:

Social anxiety. Or at least a severe, very violent case of it, anyway.

'He likes being alone' and 'he's scary' are the two most prominent ways for the students to describe Hibari Kyoya. Lisa could see why they'd get that impression, and though she agreed with the later, she couldn't help but flinch when the former was said. You see, reader, our dear little protagonist considers 'liking being alone' as impossible as witchcraft.

Humans are social creatures. We need company to stay sane. In fact, it's been scientifically proven that people who have friends live several years longer than people who don't.

And so Lisa's come to the conclusion that even though a person wants to be alone every once in a while, it's not something we want on a regular basis.

Mr. Hibari's loathing of 'crowding' just strengthens her suspicions. Even if he did like being alone, why would he be so against others getting into groups?

He's jealous. Simple as that.

The root of the problem, Lisa guessed, was a traumatic experience with bullies. They most likely picked on a friend of his, he beat them up, they lied to a teacher and made it look like his fault, his friend was afraid of his strength and didn't defend him. It also explains why he's so violent and cares so little for other people. It's cliché, but it checks out.

What a sad individual.

* * *

It was a Saturday evening when it happened.

Lisa was in the Sawada's kitchen, waiting for Reborn so she could hand him her report on Hibari Kyoya, when the future Vongola Decimo walked through the front door.

That isn't a strange occurrence in the least, of course. It's the person he was giving a piggyback ride to that didn't make sense.

Peeking her head through the door to the living room, the psychologist was greeted by an unusual sight.

The first thing she noticed was the incapacitated boy on the couch. His face was an unhealthy shade of pink-ish red (or red-ish pink; she couldn't really tell) and his coughing sounded choked. He looked pale and was shivering violently.

The next thing that caught her eye was Decimo, who was explaining to Mrs. Sawada that he found the other guy collapsed on the side of the road.

Lisa decided to wait a few more days before handing in her report.

* * *

After a quick call to Shamal and some threatening from Reborn, Mr. Hibari's fever was under control. That wasn't the interesting part, though. What Lisa was interested in was the aftermath.

That night, Decimo stayed by his Cloud Guardian's side. Reborn would've most likely made him if he didn't decide to on his own, but the point is he _did_.

It was around 2:00am when Mr. Hibari finally woke up.

The conversation that followed was as you'd expect; Decimo freaked out a little, Mr. Hibari asked what happened, Decimo explained (leaving out how he watched over the other boy, even though it was completely obvious that he did), Mr. Hibari looked to the ceiling thoughtfully.

Lisa'd be lying if she said she didn't let an amused smile slip when she noticed his flush deepen.

* * *

The next week, Reborn was sitting at the kitchen table, breezing through Lisa's report on the future Vongola Cloud Guardian.

Sipping his coffee, he couldn't help but smirk at her notes on Mr. Hibari's slight change of behavior lately.

Yes, his student was most definitely going to make a wonderful Mafioso.

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**Thanks for reading! :D**


	2. Yamamoto Takeshi

**All27 = magic. }:3**

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_**Chapter 2:**_ Yamamoto Takeshi

Lisa yawned, sitting down at her desk. And here she thought she'd only have to go through junior high once… No matter. She's here to study Vongola's heir and those he spends time with, not math; it's not like she has to actually bother with schoolwork. Once the job was done and she got her pay, she'd be back home in Italy.

Still, she had to admit she enjoyed herself. It's not every day that she got to stalk- sorry, _analyze_ such interesting people. So what if she could barely keep her sky-blue eyes open so early in the morning and her mid-back long, bright blond hair had more knots in it than a wool sweater? This was _so _worth it.

Now all she had to do was decide on her next target.

Hibari was her first choice because she didn't like his attitude; he was too stand-off-ish. Now that she's finished her report on him, she was at a loss as to who to analyze. Maybe asking around would help…

Lisa straightened when the teacher walked in, making a mental note to do just that once lunch break came around.

* * *

"Who Dame Tsuna spends the most time with?" The classmate Lisa decided to go to first, Miss. Tanaka Megumi, raised an eyebrow at the question.

"No, who _Mr. Sawada_ spends the most time with." the blond corrected. What made these people believe that they could refer to someone they barely know so rudely? Doesn't Japan stress politeness?

Miss. Tanaka frowned, but continued anyway. "Yamamoto and Gokudera."

"Is that so? What kind of people are they?"

The Japanese girl's face lit up with something Lisa could only call excitement, for lack of a better term. "Oh, they're just the best! Gokudera's so cool and edgy and awesome, but I know he's totally sweet on the inside! And Yamamoto's the nicest guys ever! He's always super kind and smiles all the time and NEVER gets mad and super, extra sexy and-"

"What did you say?" Lisa, who was banging her head against the wall for the last few sentences, perked up.

"That Yamamoto's super, extra sexy?"

"No, before that."

"You mean the part about him always smiling and never getting mad?"

"Yes, that. Has he always been this way? Do you remember any time where he's gotten upset?"

"I only moved here a few months ago, so I couldn't say. Chiyo told me that he tried to commit suicide a year ago when he broke his arm, though."

The Italian girl did a double take. "He WHAT?! And because of WHAT?!"

"Yeah." Megumi nodded, eyebrows furled. "I heard he tried to jump off the school's roof because he wouldn't be able to play in the up-coming baseball game, but got talked out of it by Dame Tsuna."

"I see…" Lisa crossed her arms and closed her eyes, trying to piece the information together, only to have her concentration shattered when Miss. Taniguchi Kanna walked up to them. The other girl had apparently been listening.

"C'mon, Megumi, don't fill her head with stupid ideas. Everyone knows it was just a prank and Dame Tsuna got all worked up; that's it." laughed the newcomer.

Ignoring the urge to smack her classmate silly, Lisa went back to her desk. It seems she's found her next target…

* * *

The future Vongola Rain Guardian was easier to figure out than she thought he would be.

It wasn't that he wasn't interesting or complicated, it's just that his situation's been taken care of already.

From what Lisa could gather, Yamamoto Takeshi broke his arm last year, tried to commit suicide, was talked out of it by Sawada Tsunayoshi and started hanging around Decimo, in that order. How these events connect to and affect each other took a bit more thinking (and a lot more stalking) to figure out.

She didn't believe Mr. Yamamoto was childish enough to want to die over a broken arm (or rather, that Reborn would let someone that childish be one of Decimo's Guardians), so that possibility was out. The Italian girl, after some consideration, decided to chalk it up to good old teenage hormones; he was probably feeling depressed and using his broken arm as an excuse.

The swordsman's decision to be around Decimo also made sense. After all, the brunette was willing to talk him, a boy he barely knew, out of suicide, while everyone else just stood there and watched. It's only natural for him to grow… attached, for lack of a better term, to the other.

It would seem that Decimo's already diffused the issues surrounding Yamamoto Takeshi, and somehow hasn't even realized they were there in the first place.

* * *

It was Tuesday, around 2:30pm, when it happened.

Lisa, by then, has decided she'd learned all she was going to about Yamamoto Takeshi, and was going to hand in her report the next day.

She was watching him practice in his family's dojo, like she'd been doing for the past few days, when Decimo entered. Apparently, he was running some errands for his mom in the area and decided to say hi.

And then she saw it.

It wasn't a very big deal, really, and it was almost unnoticeable; you couldn't really blame her for not seeing it sooner. Still, it was there; that slight change in his smile upon seeing the brunette.

Lisa had a hard time wiping that stupid grin off of her face for the rest of the day. Hats off to you, Decimo.

* * *

The next day, Reborn was sitting in the living room, looking over Lisa's report on the future Vongola Rain Guardian.

He couldn't help but chuckle at the note asking him to praise his student's skill at making friends for her.

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**Thanks to anyone who read/reviewed/favorited/followed! :D**

**So do you have any requests? What do you think of Lisa's observations? What do you think of the OCs? :D**


	3. Rokudo Mukuro

**This is where I start to beg for reviews. And maybe to have this fic on the KHR Fanfic Recs page on TvTropes. TTuTT**

**#noshame**

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_**Chapter 3:**_ Rokudo Mukuro

Lisa sighed, leaning on the mop. She was on cleaning duty with one of the future Vongola Mist Guardians, Miss. Dokuro. She'd already handed in her report on the younger girl the day before and was hoping to get started on her next target, but just couldn't decide who to analyze (stalk).

She figured that, since she didn't have anyone else in mind, she'd start gathering information on Mr. Rokudo.

"Do you have any siblings?" It was cruel to ask Miss. Dokuro questions about her family life, Lisa knew, but she didn't have any other way of getting her to talk about him. She couldn't just bring up the mafia, could she?

The purple-haired girl tensed for a second, then relaxed again, going back to moping the hallway floor. "No but… there's someone who's like an older brother to me."

"What's he like?"

"He's really cool… and smart… and strong… and he's… he's…" Miss. Dokuro hesitated, somewhat muffled by… giggles?

"He's what?" Ok, now our protagonist was interested.

"He's… kind of a pervert."

Lisa choked on her own spit.

* * *

Lisa just didn't get it.

She'd been following Mr. Rokudo around for a while now, but just didn't see why Miss. Dokuro would describe him as a pervert. She most definitely idolized him, so why?

Rokudo Mukuro was smart, cunning and deceitful; the perfect Mist user. Lisa guessed the only reason he didn't see right through her was that he didn't see her at all. Well, that and she's about ten years older than him, giving her a head start.

Funny how one small comment could set her off like this… There was so much more to Mr. Rokudo that she could focus on, yet she chooses to obsess over finding out whether he's a pervert or not. It was pathetic…

Lisa would have to add 'troll' to her description of Dokuro Chrome.

* * *

After that incident, Sunday was never again the same to Lisa.

She was watching the future Vongola Guardians and boss have sparring matches at the area on the outskirts of Namimori (so as to not hurt anybody), and it was the Mr. Rokudo vs Decimo fight. Nothing out of the ordinary, really; these matches happened once a month. Reborn decided it was a good training method.

The Italian girl was close to throwing in the towel and just handing in her report on Rokudo Mukuro; if she found nothing by the end of the day, she'd give up. And because she hates losing, she made sure to look extra hard for any signs of perversion.

And then she saw it.

It only lasted a moment; you wouldn't have seen it unless you knew what you were looking for. Still, it most definitely happened.

Rokudo Mukuro touched Sawada Tsunayoshi's butt.

Lisa choked on her own spit.

* * *

Reborn frowned, looking at Lisa's report on Rokudo Mukuro in bewilderment.

What does 'Miss. Dokuro ships Mr. Rokudo/Decimo' mean?

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**I was trying my best to be funny. I hope I succeeded. ;u;**

**Sorry for it being so short... |||OTL**

**Thank you to everyone who read/followed/favorited/reviewed! :D**

**Also, from now on I'll be giving a quick description of what the various OCs look like:**

_Tanaka Megumi – Just above mid-back length, black hair in twin-tails, big, black eyes_

_Taniguchi Kanna – Dark brown hair in a boy-ish haircut, light brown eyes, sharp features_


	4. Gokudera Hayato

**I didn't get any sleep last night, but who cares? Not me, that's for sure! 8'D**

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_**Chapter 4:**_ Gokudera Hayato

Lisa sighed, leaning back in her seat. The pleasant atmosphere of the coffee shop did nothing for her mood.

Her report on Rokudo Mukuro was way below the standard she tried to uphold; it was short and focused too much on trivia. She'd have to find time to rewrite it between targets; her employers deserved at least that much.

But now to the matter at hand.

She was waiting for the Poison Scorpion to finish her business at the pet shop next door so she could question her about the future Vongola Storm Guardian, Gokudera Hayato.

After a few minutes' wait, the pink-haired girl walked into the coffee shop, some kind of snake wrapped around her, and sat opposite of the blond. The two ordered drinks for themselves and began to talk, ignoring the brewing storm outside.

It almost felt like nature was giving them the middle figure.

"I already have all the details on Mr. Gokudera's background." Lisa said solemnly. "What I want you to tell me is how the incident with his mother, Miss. Lavina, has affected his relationship with you and your father."

It was a cruel question, but how his reaction to something so big reflected on his relations with those closest to him was just too important to ignore. She already knew he ran away from home, but that could just mean he wanted to get stronger and protect those he cares about from dying; she needed his sister's opinion on the matter.

The assassin stared into the murky liquid of her coffee, mauling over the other's words in her head. "He hates us."

* * *

Lisa probably had the hardest time following the future Vongola Storm Guardian. Not because he could spot her, of course; I didn't make all those stalker jokes for nothing. His personality just bothered her.

Gokudera Hayato was strong, smart, determined and loyal. There was no questioning his genius. What got on the psychologist's nerves were his flaws.

He wanted to protect his boss, like any right-hand man should, but he wanted to protect his precious Decimo all on his own; he refused help from anyone, which is an easy way to get yourself killed.

What's more, his temper was unreasonable. Yes, his mom's dead, but that's no excuse to act like a jerk. And no matter how hard she looked, Lisa just couldn't find a reason for that incident to make him hate his sister and dad; he knew them better than he did his mom, and there's evidence to prove his dad really did want and try to marry her.

Whatever way she tried looking at it, Gokudera Hayato was too emotional to be the Vongola Storm Guardian.

* * *

It happened on a day off from school, around noon.

Lisa was sitting in the Sawada household's kitchen, waiting for Reborn with her report on Mr. Gokudera, when there was a knock on the door.

Quietly poking her head around the corner, the blond watched as Decimo opened the door for his friend, the aforementioned Storm user. What could he want?

"I thought about what you said and…" Mr. Gokudera mumbled, before looking up. The pure determination in his eyes was overwhelming. "I want to try to talk to her. It's about time we settled this."

The brunette smiled at his future Storm Guardian encouragingly.

Lisa decided to wait a little longer before handing in her report.

* * *

The entire exchange was heartwarming and heartbreaking at the same time. Heartwarming because Mr. Gokudera was finally sorting things out with his sister, heartbreaking because it hadn't happened sooner.

By the end of a long talk in the Sawadas' living room, the siblings had made up and Lisa, not either of the Storm users, was in tears.

Maybe it wasn't a bad thing to have a lot of feelz in your heart after all.

Either way, Lisa would have to praise Decimo's skill at influencing the people around him if they ever got to talk.

* * *

Lisa scanned the rack of cards, bangles and miscellaneous small ornaments. It came as a surprise to her that Miss. Fujiko would invite her to her birthday party, but it wasn't a nuisance; her next target was invited so she'd be able to get information, and Miss. Fujiko's love of useless, 'cute' things made gift-picking easy. It was only a matter of which useless, 'cute' thing to buy.

As the Italian girl weighed the odds of her classmate liking the flower keychain, she noticed a very certain someone being dragged into the shop by his sister (who was wearing the usual mask because, honestly, making up with someone doesn't erase trauma).

They headed straight for the lovey-dovey section.

Curious and confused beyond words, Lisa watched from behind a display of build-a-bear kits as the Poison Scorpion handed Mr. Gokudera something she grabbed from one of the shelves. Looking a little closer, the psychologist realized it was a pink, plastic heart, the kind with two halves, with the letter H on the left half and T on the other.

"… Do I really have to give him this?" Mr. Gokudera looked at the object as if it were toxic.

"Yes." the pink-haired girl said darkly. "With the amount of competition you have, we'll need to pull out all the stops."

Lisa choked on her own laughter.

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**Thank you so much to anyone who read/favorited/followed/reviewed! The spike in reviews last chapter made me feel really loved. c':**

**Also, HalcyonNight's the best Beta ever. U.U**


	5. Sasagawa Kyoko

**You know that feeling when you're so tired you're drunk? .-.**

**I do. ._.**

**Also, to answer the Guest's question from last chapter: H stands for Hayato and T stands for Tsuna(yoshi). n.n**

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**_Chapter 5:_** Sasagawa Kyoko

Standing at Miss. Fujiko's door, gift in hand, Lisa stared at the doorbell with an expression somewhat resembling that look you get when you have a hard time pooping.

It's been seven years since the last time our protagonist's gone to a birthday party not involving alcohol. She didn't even really remember what preteens actually do in these sort of situations. She was completely ill-prepared.

She pressed the doorbell.

YOLO.

An aloof girl who looked to be about eighteen years old opened the door, accompanied by music playing from inside, and gave the Italian girl a quick once-over. The only feature of hers Lisa bothered taking in was her many piercings. "You must be one of the brats here for my sister's party."

"No, I'm one of the _people_ here for your sister's party." our protagonist corrected, mildly amused by the irony of the other girl's words.

Miss. Fujiko's older sister's eyes narrowed, but she didn't seem to care enough to respond, instead calling her younger sibling over. "Yo, Naomi! Another one of the brats you invited's here!"

"Coming, Yoko!" assured a voice from inside, followed by the sound of footsteps. In a few moments, the younger Fujiko was replacing the teenager who thought she knew it all. "Oh, good evening, Lisa! I'm glad you could make it."

"Thank you for inviting me." Lisa smiled politely before handing the other girl her present and being dragged inside.

* * *

Lisa watched the various scenes and conversations from the corner of the room, drinking her fifth glass of grape juice.

There were a lot of things that could catch her attention (Miss. Fujiko practically invited the entire school), but she mostly stayed focused on her target: Sasagawa Kyoko. The younger girl's been with her friend, Kurokawa Hana, for most of the night, the two of them surrounded by fanboys.

Bored, Lisa weighed her options; keep watching (stalking) Miss. Sasagawa, go on to watching (stalking) someone else, engage in social activity or keep trying to get drunk of off grape juice.

The effects of the last option may have been getting to her, because the more she stuck with the first, the more appealing it seemed.

Over half way through her eleventh glass, she was approached by the future Vongola Sun Guardian, who she'd finished her report on before starting her analyzing (stalking) of Miss. Dokuro a while ago.

"Can I help you?" she questioned, eyebrow raised.

"Can you extremely tell me the time?" he asked sheepishly. As sheepishly as the 'extreme' Sasagawa Ryohei could, anyway.

"I can tell you the time, but I don't think I can do it extremely." The blond fished out the cellphone from her pocket, checking the clock. "6:32pm."

"I extremely thank you."

"No problem." Putting the communication device away, Lisa decided she'd get more information about Miss. Sasagawa by talking to her brother than watching (stalking) her. It could've just been the grape juice, though. "What kind of person is Sasagawa Kyoko?"

"My sister?" Ryohei looked slightly taken aback by the question, but recovered quickly. "She's a very EXTREME person!"

Our protagonist wasn't sure if he was just being nice or there was more to her target than meets the eye. She must be a Rain; they're confusing.

The girl closed her eyes and crossed her arms, like she always did when concentrating. "I see…"

There were some other questions she wanted to ask, but decided to leave it for now when a ginger-haired girl came up to them and asked if she could talk to Mr. Sasagawa, saying something about Miss. Fujiko's mother needing some extra hands in the kitchen. Lisa said her conversation with the boxer was done and returned to her grape juice.

She was on her way to get her twelfth glass when she was stopped by Miss. Kurokawa.

"Alright, spill." demanded the Japanese girl.

"Spill what? Grape juice?" Lisa raised the empty cup. "If that's the case, I need to refill."

Miss. Kurokawa sighed in irritation. "You've been watching Kyoko since you've arrived, and you were talking to her brother just now. Don't try to deny it."

Noting the other's observation skills, the blond chose her words carefully. "I'm drunk on grape juice. I have no idea what I was doing or why."

The younger girl gave up and went to do one thing or another.

With a triumphant smirk, the Italian walked over to where the drinks were. "Totally nailed it."

* * *

Five more cups of grape juice and a trip to the bathroom later, Lisa was on the verge of giving up.

Sasagawa Kyoko was a sweet, beautiful, kind, gentle and annoyingly useless person. Nothing more, nothing less; what you see is what you get. There was no reason to keep watching (stalking) her.

And then it happened.

Finally breaking away from the crowd of fanboys, the brunette headed straight for Sawada Tsunayoshi, who was currently alone as Mr. Yamamoto and Mr. Gokudera were being swarmed by their fanclubs.

It didn't seem like anything special at first, of course; Miss. Sasagawa and Decimo were friends, after all. The strange part happened a few minutes later, when Mr. Yamamoto also got away from his fans and, very subtly, stirred the conversation away from the school's idol.

The icy smile Miss. Sasagawa sent the future Vongola Rain Guardian as she went to look for Miss. Kurokawa was enough to send shivers down Lisa's spine.

* * *

Lisa was the only one not surprised when rotten cheese was found in the baseball player's locker the next Monday.

Sasagawa Kyoko was a girl you did not want to cross.

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**Thanks for reading/favoriting/following/reviewing! :D**

**How this chapter's OC(s) look:**

_Fujiko Naomi – thick, shoulder-length, black hair, big, black eyes_

_Fujiko Yoko – thick, upper back-length, black hair loosely held up by a white hair clip, black eyes, lots of piercings_

_The ginger-haired 'girl' was a reference to Alex, the feminine but male protagonist of HalcyonNight's Halcyonic. It's really good! :D_


	6. Miura Haru

**Writing this was hard because Haru's brand of cute isn't obviously yandere, unlike Kyoko's. :L**

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_**Chapter 6:**_ Miura Haru

Lisa frowned at the various desserts, not sure what to get.

She wasn't really the type to eat sweets; even as a child, she never understood why her friends complained about how they're going to gain weight, but ate a lot of cakes, cookies and the like anyway. But when she overheard some classmates talking about how good this bakery in town was, she let her curiosity get the better of her and decided to check it out between targets.

Now all she had to do was decide what she wanted to buy. Everything looked good, but looks can be deceiving; she needed to be sure.

"Is this your first time here?" asked a female voice. Turning around, Lisa came face-to-face with Miura Haru.

"It is. I take it you're a regular?" The Italian smiled politely.

"Yeah! I've decided today is the once-a-month Haru Appreciation Day, in which I buy cake to reward myself, desu! I usually celebrate with my friend, but she had an appointment with the dentist this time."

"I see… I'm Lisa Altimari, by the way." Lisa reached out a hand for Miss. Miura to shake. The name was fake, but there was no reason to disclose that information. Besides, it's the one that she used to enroll with, so it wasn't as if she was lying.

The purple-haired girl's smile seemed to broaden even more, if that was possible, as she accepted the gesture. "Nice to meet you! I'm Miura Haru, desu!"

Miss. Miura then advised our protagonist on what cake to buy and invited her over to eat.

Lisa decided to just go with it and started her analyzing (stalking) of her new acquaintance.

* * *

"Got any hobbies?" Lisa asked. The two girls were sitting at a low table in Miss. Miura's room, eating the cake they bought.

"I do gymnastics, desu!" beamed the Japanese. The blond wasn't sure how she had so much energy.

"What school do you go to?"

"Midori Middle, desu!" What was up with that verbal tic?

"Isn't it super hard to get into?"

"It's not _that_ hard…" Lies.

The two fell into a comfortable silence.

Looking around, the Italian girl spotted a picture of a generic-looking man with glasses, a preteen boy who looked a lot like the other person in the room, and a child who our protagonist assumed was a younger Miss. Miura. "Is that your family?"

"Hahi?" Miss. Miura followed Lisa's gaze, grinning when she saw where it led. "Yeah! My dad, my brother and me from ten years ago! My mom was the one who took the picture; she's a photographer, desu!"

The blond couldn't help but let an amused smile slip at the other's abuse of the exclamation mark.

* * *

'Yandere' is a word Lisa's made sure to become very well acquainted with since the incident with Miss. Sasagawa. That… 'situation', she concluded, has forever ruined her ability to believe a cute, love-struck girl could be anything else.

That proved to be very useful very soon.

After a while of watching (stalking) Miss. Miura, an interesting predicament had reared its head:

Miss. Miura invited Decimo to watch a movie with her (without telling him it was a romantic movie, of course). The problem was that Mr. Gokudera tagged along.

Lisa couldn't help but shiver in fear for the future Vongola Storm Guardian when she noticed the ice in the purple-haired girl's smile.

* * *

That Friday, huge spiders were found in the bomber's locker.

Our protagonist had to wonder how Miss. Miura pulled _that_ off, but decided she's better off not knowing.

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**I said Haru's brand of cute isn't **_**obviously**_** yandere; not that it isn't yandere at all. X9**

**Thank you to anyone who read/favorited/followed/reviewed! :D**


	7. Kozato Enma

**You know what? Everyone who reads this gets a virtual hug. *Hugs* }:3**

**Also, this chapter's rating is T for language. Lisa rants. :[**

**I'll go back to the usual rating for the next chapter, though. n.n**

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_**Chapter 7:**_ Kozato Enma

The thought that guys could be yandere too occurred to Lisa the Monday after Miss. Miura's 'prank' on Mr. Gokudera, during an English lesson. It was a simple thought, really, and it probably wouldn't have bothered her a little while ago. Nevertheless, it made her uneasy.

After a few moments of consideration, she decided it was probably a good thing that it bothered her; after all, if there was anything her time at Namimori has taught her, it had to be that some very scary people were head-over-heels in love with Sawada Tsunayoshi.

Steadying herself, the blond looked over at the boss of Simon. With the information she got from Reborn about what happened between the Vongola and Simon recently and the information she now had on yandere, she just couldn't help being unnerved…

And so she decided on her next target.

* * *

Out of all her targets so far, Kozato Enma was most definitely Lisa's favorite. Honestly, how could he _not_ be?

He was kind and polite, the two most important traits a person could have, as far as she was concerned, yet he had the perseverance to not give up on his goals; a rare combination.

No matter what anyone said, the Simon Decimo was a strong boy. Lisa was sure of it.

Now all she needed to do was figure out whether he was yandere or not…

* * *

"You want me to tell you about Loser Enma?" Miss. Tanaka raised an eyebrow. Quite frankly, Lisa wanted nothing to do with her; the only reason she even bothered remembering the girl's name was that she behaved enough like an Information Broker to be useful.

"No, I want information about _Mr. Kozato_." The blond couldn't help but twitch a little. She's had just about enough of her classmates being disrespectful to people they've probably barely said two words to. Thinking it over, maybe she should've had this conversation _before_ she started her analysis (stalking) of the Simon Decimo… You see, reader, our protagonist's always had this bad habit of getting attached to her targets and getting upset when they're insulted. Whether she's in the right or wrong, the situation always ends in a mess.

The Japanese girl shook her head. "You sure have a weird taste in boys, Lisa… Are you _sure_ you wouldn't rather hear about Gokudera or Yamamoto?"

"Very sure." By this point Lisa was questioning why she was wasting her lunch break with such a shallow moron, as well as her every decision leading up to this moment.

"If you say so…" Miss. Tanaka looked reluctant, but spoke anyway. "He's always either with Dame Tsuna, that third-year with green hair, some fat guy, an old-looking guy, the scary girl with who acts like Hibari 2.0, this really scary guy from the baseball club or the girl who dresses like Lady Gaga, and he acts like another Dame Tsuna. It's kind of pathetic."

Lisa begrudgingly thanked the other girl for her time before going to look for one of the redhead's Guardians, trying with all her willpower to not hit Miss. Tanaka for being so rude to people over a trillion times nicer than herself (in most of the above cases, anyway).

* * *

Lisa wasn't sure why she decided to ask Mr. Aoba about the Simon Decimo. In fact, after thinking it over when all was said and done, she could see several big flaws with the idea right away. If you asked, she'd blame it on her still being upset over that conversation with Miss. Tanaka.

"Excuse me? Upperclassman Aoba?" The blond approached the green-haired boy, hoping she was calm enough to not be shaking in quiet fury at her classmate.

He turned to her, eyebrow raised. "What do you want?"

"I have a question about your friend, Mr. Kozato. Has he ever gotten overly attached to someone or something?"

The Simon Forest Guardian seemed to consider it for a moment, then shook his head. "No, I don't think Loser Enma's ever-"

"Were you the one who coined that nickname?"

That was the straw that broke the camel's back.

"I guess…"

Lisa snapped.

"I see…"

_Badly_.

"You little piece of rotten dog shit…" The Italian girl was trembling with rage.

Mr. Aoba's eyes widened, but she continued before he could speak.

"Just who the hell do you think you are, referring to your boss like that? What kind of shit Guardian _are_ you? Kozato Enma is the Simon Decimo, and a damn nice guy. You should feel _honored_ to be working under him, not being a prick about it. I swear to god or science or panties or Reborn or whatever you believe in, if you don't start showing Mr. Kozato the respect he deserves, _I will cut off your balls with a blunt knife and feed them to you_."

And with that, the fuming psychologist left a very confused Aoba Koyo to try to figure out what just happened.

* * *

The next day (and every day after that), she avoided Mr. Aoba like the plague. What was she thinking, mentioning the mafia like that? Oh yeah, _she wasn't thinking_. _At all_._ And she didn't have the guts to apologies for blowing up at him like that. God damn it_. _God damn it to hell and back._

"… Miss. Altimari? Are you alright?"

Lisa didn't even realize she was facepalming. Letting her hand drop to her side, she smiled at the redhead. "It's nothing." It seemed Mr. Aoba was too confused to bring it up with the other Simons… so far.

As luck (or the teacher) would have it, she and the Simon Decimo were paired for a science project over the weekend. The two were on their way to her apartment to get started on it.

They were about half way there when they overheard a group of rough-looking, older (older than Mr. Kozato, anyway) boys in an alleyway laughing about how they beat up a guy with fluffy brown hair and stole his bag.

The Simon Decimo politely asked the blond if it would be alright to start their project the next day.

She agreed and left to go to her apartment; she had a feeling she knew where the situation was heading.

* * *

Lisa couldn't say she was surprised when she saw Decimo in possession of his schoolbag, a news report on a few delinquents who got sent to the emergency room at the hospital and Mr. Hibari giving the Simon Decimo an approving nod the next Monday.

In conclusion, Kozato Enma was less 'yandere' and more 'violently protective'.

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**Thank you to anyone who read/favorited/followed/reviewed! :D**

**I like yandere way more than I should. 8'D**

**Also, HOLY SHIT 1000+ VIEWS I LOVE YOU ALL *Caramelldansening on a table* 8'D**


	8. Dino

**Ok, no more yandere… for now. ;9**

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_**Chapter 8:**_ Dino

A generic ringtone resounded throughout the rented, medium-sized apartment.

Lisa wearily picked the cellphone up from her nightstand and held it to her ear. "Luke, do you have any idea what time it is in Japan?"

"No, but that doesn't matter! I've got something important to tell you!" urged the boy on the other side. The girl sat up in bed, now interested; her younger twin wasn't the type to panic for nothing. "Do you remember Dino?"

"I think so…" She cringed, searching the back of her mind for the memory. "He's the Cavallone boss, right? The guy you go drinking with sometimes?"

"Yeah, him! He's on his way to Japan!"

"And I should care because…?"

Luke rolled his eyes. She just _knew_ he rolled his eyes. "Maybe because he's Reborn's previous student and a friend of the future Vongola Decimo, which means you'll probably be stalking him?"

Lisa facepalmed at her own ignorance.

She wasn't too worried her brother's friend, in all honesty. She doubted he remembered her, much less her job; she could just introduce herself as Luke's sister, say she was in Japan on vacation, invite him to go drinking and get to know him.

Bars only open evening to night, though, so she had plenty of time for some good old fashion stalking.

Saying a quick thanks to her brother and hanging up the phone, Lisa went back to sleep. Devoted to her job she may be, there's no way she was going to get up at 2:30am just to stalk someone.

* * *

A few hours after Luke called, at a much more comfortable time, the phone rang again. That time, it was Reborn telling Lisa Dino would be picking Tsuna up after school by himself.

And so I bring you the matter at hand:

Our protagonist was hiding in a crowd of girls who were cooing at how 'hot' the Cavallone boss was and raging about how he was talking to 'Dame Tsuna', watching the exchange happening over at the school gates quietly.

"A whole lot of interesting people really like Dame Tsuna, huh?" The blond gave the girl next to her an alarmed look. Did she know about the mafia? Probably not, as she misinterpreted it as bewilderment and elaborated. "Gokudera and Yamamoto, his best friends, are a genius wannabe delinquent and a baseball-crazy guy who's a lot smarter than he lets on. Loser Enma, who I've seen him with enough to call them friends, has his own following of nut-jobs. Kyoko, the school idol who's scarier than she looks, is most definitely in love with him. Kyoko's brother, who I've seen punch through a wall, is dead set on having him join the boxing club. Hibari, who needs no explanation, has been stricter with bullies lately, which isn't much until you realize Dame Tsuna is their most common victim. A gymnast from Midori, the best school in the area, that I've seen with him outside of school is absolutely infatuated with him. A baby with a fedora, a baby in a cow suit and a baby who knows martial arts follow him around. And now there's this guy, who is obviously very fond of him, picking him up from school. See the pattern?"

Lisa could feel the color drain from her face.

Her knees were shaking so much that they may have given out at any moment.

_This was impossible._

"Wh-who are you?" stuttered the Italian girl, panicking. How did this random girl notice so much?

"Miruhara Namiko of the Paranormal Club." The Japanese's already serious expression darkened. "I think Sawada Tsunayoshi and those around him may be aliens."

Lisa did a facefault.

Getting back to her feet, she sweatdropped. "I don't think that's the c-"

Miss. Miruhara stormed off, her ponytail nearly smacking the blond, mumbling something about 'narrow-minded idiots'.

Well that was rude.

Making a mental note to tell Reborn that one of the students knew _something_ wasn't normal about 'Dame Tsuna', the psychologist returned her attention to Dino and Decimo. Mr. Gokudera was restocking on dynamite and Mr. Yamamoto had cleaning duty, so it was just them.

She couldn't help but giggle a little when she noticed how hard Dino was trying to be cool.

Lisa would've kept watching, but Mr. Hibari came and attacked the Cavallone boss, scaring the onlookers away. At least he hasn't been outright attacking people for 'crowding' as much, though, right?

* * *

Although she won't admit it, Lisa loved drinking. Not to the point of addiction, but it still made her happy. That's why she was ecstatic to be going to a pub, even if it was for work.

The two blonds were sitting at the bar, drinks in hand. They were both on their third round, but Dino seemed to already be drunk. The night was doing to be… interesting, to say the least.

"I picked Tuna***** up from school today…" drawled the boy. "I was trying to show him I'm cool, y'know? But then Kyoya came and hit me…" Right. He didn't know she was there. (And he was drunk.) "Do you think Tuna likes me?"

"Of course he likes you." Lisa assured, sipping her alcohol. "You've survived Reborn's training; he must look up to you as a hero."

"I meant if he likes me _that_ way."

Lisa chocked on her drink.

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*****That was not a typo. Please put down the flamethrower.

**Thank you to anyone who read/followed/favorited/reviewed! :D**

**Question: Does anyone know if Spanner stayed in Japan after the last arc? I'm not sure... |||OTL**

**What this chapter's OCs looked like:**

_Luke – basically Lisa with a flat chest and hair the normal length for a boy_

_Miruhara Namiko – mid-back length, black hair in a high ponytail, delicate glasses, black eyes_


	9. Irie Shoichi

**I've noticed something. KHR has this unnatural ability to steal my soul every time I so much as see fanart of it. ;_;**

**Also, this chapter contains some Uni/Byakuran. Sorry if it bothers anyone, but it needed to happen. :[**

**I try to only have all27, but if there're any side pairings you guys want feel free to tell me in a review or PM. n.n**

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_**Chapter 9:**_ Irie Shoichi

Lisa looked at the co-bosses of the newly-formed Millefiore family awkwardly. The three of them were sitting around an outdoors table at a local café.

A little while ago, when the two started their relationship, Gamma had hired her to analyze (stalk) Byakuran; he wanted to make sure the white-haired boy wouldn't hurt his daughter figure. Once the job was done and the couple was approved of, he decided to tell both of them about the analyzing (stalking); they seemed to understand his worries, but Lisa just couldn't bring herself to not feel strange around them.

Yes, her job involved invasion of privacy, but that didn't mean she had to like it. It was disrespectful and the reason why she was so formal with her targets until a job was done.

Still, the psychologist couldn't deny Byakuran and Uni being in Japan on some kind of business was a good chance to learn things about her current target.

Which brings us to the matter at hand.

"What can you tell me about Mr. Irie?" Lisa stirred her grape juice with the straw. This conversation was _way_ out of her comfort zone…

"Hmm…" Byakuran played with the marshmallows he ordered instead of a drink, thinking. "He likes this band called Blood &amp; Peppers, he's a really good mechanic, he gets stomachaches when he's anxious…"

Uni tilted her glass from side to side, watching the pink juice slush around. "He has Sun Flames, right?"

The white-haired boy smiled that smug smile of his. "Right. And he's in love with Tsunayoshi."

Lisa choked on her grape juice.

* * *

Lisa flipped through the manga's pages, eyebrow twitching.

After her little talk with Byakuran and Uni, she decided it was about time that she learnt about harems and headed straight for the manga store.

She was sure finding a story resembling Decimo's situation would be easy, but she just couldn't find a harem lead (or reverse harem lead, for that matter) quite like him; they were all either generic guys/girls with no personality or complete morons. Was it really so hard to write a harem story where the readers can understand why everyone wants the protagonist?

After being unimpressed with yet another harem story whose 'humor' came mainly from female-on-male abuse portrayed as funny instead of sickening, she reached for a normal shonen manga; she vaguely remembered some girls at school talking about how 'shonen heroes are boy magnets in-story'…

… Only for another hand to reach for that exact same manga. Cliché meeting is cliché.

Retreating, the blond smiled at the other person (who also retracted). "Sorry, did you want that one?"

She momentarily panicked when she realized it was her current target.

"Yeah." Mr. Irie nervously scratched the back of his head. "I was actually picking it up for my friend, since I was already out."

"Well that's nice of you."

"Thanks…" He seemed awkward. Was she being too friendly? "Why did _you_ want it?"

Lisa supposed it was logical; shonen is boys' manga, after all, regardless of the number of BL fangirls. "Research. Someone I know has unknowingly gotten a harem, so I'm looking up similar situations for reference. I couldn't find anything I identified with in the harem section, so I decided to follow a schoolmate's advice and take a look at shonen."

The redhead's eyes widened a bit and his cheeks turned pink-ish. "O-oh."

"Oh?" A cat-like grin found its way to the Italian's face. A 25-year-old woman should be above teasing some kid, but she _did _currently look like a preteen… "You're blushing. Are you in a similar situation~?"

"That's none of your business." He stared her down as best he could, face still flushed.

Satisfied, the girl skipped off, wondering if telling Byakuran of the incident would make her feel a little less awkward around him and Uni. "Good luck with Decimo, Mr. Irie!"

Lisa would later facewall when she realized how stupid the above statement was and how little information that trip to the manga store gave her.

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**Thank you to anyone who read/followed/favorited/reviewed! :D**

**I don't like this chapter, but I don't see anything I could add. :Y**


	10. Spanner

**Spanner's awesome. Your argument is invalid. ._.**

**This is actually my first time reaching 10 chapters in a story… ;u;**

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_**Chapter 10:**_ Spanner

Lisa, quite frankly, couldn't stand Miruhara Namiko.

Yes, the Japanese girl was very perceptive, but she was also all the things Lisa hated; arrogant, self-centered, stubborn, rude and with a serious superiority complex. According to Miss. Taniguchi, Miss. Miruhara's older brother was on the student council, adding to her mightier-than-thou attitude.

Still, the blond couldn't ignore her observation skills.

Which brings us to _this_ god-awful exchange. God-awful in our protagonist's eyes, anyway.

"Have you seen anyone else around Mr. Sawada?" Lisa forced out the words, hoping against hope that she wouldn't be spending her entire lunch break talking to this girl.

Miss. Miruhara's eyes lit up as she turned to the Italian. "Have you changed your mind about my theory?"

"Sure." Her eyebrow twitched at the reply, but she knew the other wouldn't give her any information if she disagreed with her.

"Good, so you're not a complete moron." That little… "Yes, I've seen other strange people around Dame Tsuna; a bespectacled redhead and a blond who smelt of machine oi- Hey!"

The psychologist turned around and walked away.

It would seem that Lisa's not as strong-willed as she thought; she really _can't_ talk to this girl. Reborn could do his own information-gathering; she was hired to analyze Decimo's associates, not some alien-crazy preteen.

* * *

It didn't take a genius to figure out Miss. Miruhara was speaking of Irie Shoichi (who seemed to have been too confused to mention Lisa's slipup to anyone) and Spanner (who's been staying with Mr. Irie).

The girl decided to make the blond mechanic her next target, if only to feel satisfied about having more information than Miss. Miruhara. Petty, yes, but that's just how our protagonist was. Kind of pathetic, actually…

On the third day of her analyzing (stalking) of him, the Italian girl followed the green-eyed boy into a parts store. She wasn't sure what project he was working on, but he sure seemed determined to make it work.

And then it happened.

Lisa was hiding behind a pile of metal objects whose use she wasn't quite sure of, when a thought crossed her mind:

What if Sawada Tsunayoshi doesn't have any kids? Wouldn't that mean the end of Vongola?

It was out of place and she honestly didn't know why it occurred to her, but it was still an interesting idea; Decimo was a boy magnet, and might be into guys himself. If that happens, how would Vongola get an heir?

That train of thought isn't what you, the reader, cares about, though, is it? You're _much_ more interested in the aftermath. Which basically consist of Lisa spacing out, knocking the pile of parts over and giving herself up.

The gods of stalking would be ashamed.

Panicking under the other blond's blank stare, a stuttered 'hi' was all she could muster.

"Hi." he replied, turning back to looking through the shelves of metal objects.

Calming herself, the psychologist moved to stand behind the mechanic, looking over his shoulder. "What are you looking for?"

"Parts."

The girl's eyebrow twitched, but she had to admire his dedication. "_Why_ are you looking for parts? What are you working on?"

"I'm trying to build a system people can upload their consciousness onto so they can be giant robots."

Lisa choked on her own spit.

* * *

Lisa cringed at the papers in her hands.

She was sitting in the Sawadas' living room, opposite of Reborn. She was trying to figure out what goes on in her target's head when he called, saying he had something she might find interesting.

"A giant robot." she deadpanned. "The Vongola Decimo wanted to be _a giant robot_."

The former Arcobaleno stared at her with those blank eyes of his. "It's pathetic, but he was a kid."

The blond sighed, putting the papers down on the table. "Not really. It just explains a lot."

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**Thank you to anyone who read/followed/favorited/reviewed! :D**

**Also, special thanks to HalcyonNight for giving me the idea of involving the giant robot thing. :D**


	11. Fuuta

**Don't judge me, Fuuta's adorable. Q^Q**

**And besides, it's just an innocent crush… =3=**

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_**Chapter 11:**_ Fuuta

"Why don't you stay for a cup of coffee?"

Lisa turned around to face the woman, surprised. In all the times she'd been at the Sawadas' house to speak with Reborn, not once has Sawada Nana said anything to her past standard pleasantries. "I really have to get go-"

"I insist."

The psychologist stiffened at the subtle edge to the woman's words. Mumbling a quiet 'ok', she sat down at the kitchen table.

A short time, the two were sitting opposite each other, each with a steaming cup of coffee in front of her.

The quiet was unnerving.

"I know why you're here." Mrs. Sawada smiled. It was the kind of smile that was just… _off_, and it made Lisa want to run and hide.

"You… what?" The blond could barely breathe. Did she really slip up this badly? It wasn't possible… How much did Decimo's mother know, exactly? This was bad… really bad…

"You're a friend of my Tsu-kun who's nice enough to play with Reborn!"

Lisa did a facefault.

"Something like that…" our protagonist murmured from the floor as the woman beamed.

"I really do appreciate it." The Italian girl got back to her seat. "You know, you're a lot quieter than the others; it's almost as if you're an adult." There's no 'almost' about it, thank you very much. "Would it be any trouble if I asked you to watch the kids this Saturday?"

Seeing it as a good opportunity to observe them (and honestly being a little afraid of refusing), Lisa accepted.

* * *

Lisa's done a lot of things she wasn't proud of during her time employed by Vongola. Blowing up at someone she didn't really know, blurting out things about the mafia around her targets, giving herself up by spacing out and knocking down machine parts, messing up a report because she got trolled, almost pissing herself because of an average housewife… The list just wouldn't end.

The thing she was most ashamed of was getting caught by a 9-year-old. A nine-year-old with magic powers, but still a nine-year-old.

Lambo and I-pin were taking their afternoon nap and Reborn was somewhere, doing whatever Reborn does, and she was sitting in the living room, playing random games on her phone, when Fuuta came up to her. She didn't think much of it until he opened his mouth.

"Did Reborn hire you?"

The phone dropped to her lap.

The girl could feel panic numb her system. There was no doubt about it this time, and she was most definitely not happy.

The boy just stood there, looking at her with those big, innocent eyes of his. What was up with kids and kicked puppy-expressions, anyway?

"Why do you ask?" she forced out, trying not to give away any information.

"You come here and talk to Reborn often, but you're never with Tsuna-nii or the others."

She knew she should've been more careful around the kids… She had a feeling, but _no_, she just _had_ to take it easy. Stupid, stupid, stupid…

"Look." Lisa stopped her mental ranting at herself and made eye contact with the boy, surprised by the conviction in his eyes. "Just… just don't hurt Tsuna-nii, ok? You don't seem dangerous, but if you hurt him… I'll hurt you."

All she could do was nod dumbly.

* * *

Lisa plopped onto her bed, cellphone calling and held up to her ear.

"Lisa?" rung a female voice from the other side; an old friend.

"I am _never_ having kids."

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**Thank you to anyone who read/followed/favorited/reviewed! :D**

**Fuuta's a badass. =u=v**

**I think I'll do Basil next, then some Varia members (Xanxus, Squalo, Bel) and Fran (who technically hasn't joined the Varia yet), then get onto the cast's misadventures. n.n**

**How this chapter's OC looked:**

_Michiru (The girl Lisa called) – knee-long white hair, light blue eyes, sly features_


	12. Basil

**There aren't nearly enough Basil/Tsuna fics out there. :L**

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_**Chapter 12:**_ Basil

Lisa blinked at the contract sitting innocently on the table in front of her, a little surprised. "You want me to monitor Decimo and his surroundings once I'm done with the reports on individual people?"

"Yes." Iemitsu nodded. He was visiting his family for once, bringing Basil along because he wanted to see Tsuna (and the others). He also had some news from Nono to relay to the girl, so the two sat down in the Sawadas' kitchen to talk. "As a psychologist, you know how fragile the human mind is. Working with the mafia, you must realize how much stress this would put on kids."

"You want me to look out for any signs of their mentality reaching its limit."

"More or less."

There was a tense silence as she thought the proposition over.

She didn't mind working exclusively for Vongola and the pay was good, not to mention she'd get to keep studying the interesting people Decimo was surrounded by. She was already used to living in Namimori, so moving wasn't a problem, either. Sure she'd be a little far away from her contacts and family, but she still had the means to call them. How many days a year she'd have off was reasonable too…

"I'll take the job." the younger blond finally said, signing the contract, before saying a polite goodbye to the man and leaving to find her target.

She wondered whether Sawada Iemitsu cared about Sawada Tsunayoshi as a father or as a member of Vongola for a moment, but dismissed it soon after.

Even if she cared, it wasn't her job nor place to.

* * *

Lisa sighed as she read the name displayed on her phone's screen, then held the device in front of her.

As soon as she answered the call, she was bombarded by yelled questions.

Once the screaming was over and done with, our protagonist put the cell to her ear. "Good afternoon to you too, Rosa."

"Answer me _right now_! Where are you, and more importantly, _where the hell is my brother_?!"

"I'm on my way to my apartment and your brother is at the Sawada residence."

The (rude) 16-year-old then ranted about how upset she was with her acquaintance for leaving her 'precious little brother' alone. It was creepy and pathetic, how possessive she was of the poor boy. Lisa couldn't blame him for wanting to stay as far away from her as possible.

In the end, the blond was able to appease Rosa by promising to check on him before returning to her duties.

What a pain.

* * *

Unlike his sister, Basil was a very pleasant and polite person. Lisa didn't know him very well, but has enjoyed previous conversations with him.

She could never quite get rid of that bad feeling she got upon finding out he was a Rain, though; they somehow always found ways to scare her.

"Lady Lisa?" the (even more polite than Lisa) boy walked up to the Sawada residence's gate, confused.

"It's been a while, huh?" she smiled. "Still using lord and lady, I see."

He nodded. "Not that it's not nice to see you again, but why did you come back here?"

"Rosa."

The younger blond cringed at the name. "Oh."

"So you came to Japan to see Decimo, right?" Lisa tried to change the topic, understanding why he wouldn't want to talk about the crazy teen. He seemed to appreciate it, his face brightening considerably.

"Yeah, we're friends."

"He's a nice boy. I can understand why so many people are in love with him."

Basil's eyes widened in shock and his face turned pink-ish. "I d-don't-"

"I never said you did." the girl deadpanned. "Now I know you definitely do, though."

At this point, she wasn't even surprised.

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**Thank you to anyone who read/followed/favorited/reviewed! :D**

**Hurray, Lisa's getting used to people confessing their undying love for Tsuna! XD**

**How this chapter's OC looks:**

_Rosa – butt-long, dirty blond hair, hazel brown eyes_


	13. Fran

**Fran's one of my favorite characters, honestly. I wish he got some more screen time. :[**

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_**Chapter 13:**_ Fran

Our protagonist followed the redhead, looking around nervously. Kokuyo Land just gave her the creeps.

Lisa wasn't sure how, but she's been roped into becoming a babysitter. It probably had something to do with her fear of refusing Mrs. Sawada.

Apparently, the Kokuyo Gang heard about how the brunette had gotten her to babysit Fuuta, Lambo and I-pin, and decided that if she could handle three mafia kids at once, she'd deal with Fran just fine.

At least it was a good way of getting to know him.

"Miss. M.M?" Lisa wasn't exactly sure how to approach the girl. She didn't seem like the type of person the blond was comfortable with; it just felt like she was gonna blow up at any second.

"What?" snapped the younger of the two.

"What kind of kid is Fran?"

"Hmm…" Miss. M.M thought for a moment, then frowned. "He's weird."

The Italian raised an eyebrow. "Weird?"

"Yeah. For example, when we first met him, he thought we were all fairies."

"I… see." Well he _was_ a child. When Lisa was little she believed herself to be a superhero, so she wasn't really in a position to judge him.

The French girl's expression softened. "He's a nice kid, though. He can always get people to act more… human."

The psychologist found herself smiling in light amusement. "That's just how people are. Dealing with kids isn't the same as dealing with adults, so when faced with a situation where they're stuck with a child, someone who has more experience killing than enjoying life will almost certainly show that they're not so above it all."

M.M stopped walking and gapped at Lisa. "Lisa…"

"Yes?" The blond paused, confused.

"Are you sure you're fourteen?"

Lisa stood there, frozen with fear and marinating in her own panic for several minutes, before the redhead sighed, grumbled something about our protagonist being an idiot and continued to drag Lisa to the Kokuyo Gang's hideout.

* * *

There she was, sitting in the Kokuyo Gang's 'living room', and watching over a kid illusionist. How the hell did Mr. Rokudo convince Fran's grandmother to let her grandson join the mafia, anyway?

"Are you happy here?" Lisa asked as she watched the child play with his illusions. He was talented, she could tell that much.

The green-haired boy paused for a moment, but recovered soon after, continuing his playing. "I guess. I get to see a lot of interesting people, and I talk to grandma on the phone every day so I don't miss her _too_ much."

A grin found its way to the blond's face. "So you like watching interesting people, huh?"

Fran nodded, turning his full attention to her. "Yeah. You too?"

"Yes, very much." She couldn't help but chuckle a bit.

"You're a stalker."

The older of the two did a facefault. The way he put it, it sounded like she was some kind of creep…

Recovering, she tried to change the subject. "So have you found out anything interesting?"

The boy nodded darkly. "U-huh. I have a lot of competition."

"In what?" What could a kid have competition in? Did he mean he had competition as an illusionist?

"Getting Tsuna to like me."

Lisa choked on her own spit. This was getting old...

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**Thank you to anyone who read/followed/favorited/reviewed! :D**

**Guess Lisa's not used to Tsuna's magnetic nature quite yet. XD**


	14. Belphegor

**You know how four is death? Bel's laugh is 'Ushishishi', which sounds like 'Shi, shi, shi', or 'Four, four, four', and he's Prince the Reaper! O.O**

**Fridge brilliance, right there. U.U**

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_**Chapter 14:**_ Belphegor

Put bluntly, Lisa was ecstatic upon finding out the Varia was staying in Japan for an uncertain amount of time. Apparently, they needed to learn to trust Decimo.

Mr. Lussuria, Mr. Leviathan and Mammon were staying with the Kokuyo Gang because of all the extra room, Mr. Superbi and Mr. Belphegor were staying with Mr. Yamamoto because Mr. Superbi wanted a sword-wielding training partner and Mr. Belphegor likes sushi, and Mr. Xanxus was staying with the Sawada family because… well… the only explanation Lisa could come up with was that Nono wanted the future boss of Vongola and the boss of Varia to learn to get along as fast as possible.

None of that mattered much, though; our protagonist was just happy to get to analyze (stalk) the infamously problematic Varia. How interesting was _that_?

Analyzing (stalking) the Varia was going to be _awesome_.

* * *

Lisa wasn't completely sure whether she wanted to start with Mr. Superbi or Mr. Belphegor after the art teacher paired her up with Mr. Yamamoto for an assignment, but the universe seemed to have decided for her; when she got to the Yamamoto residence that Sunday, the two swordsmen were out practicing, the elder Yamamoto went back to the kitchen after greeting her and asking her to wait a few minutes, and Mr. Belphegor was at one of the tables, sharpening his knives.

Smiling brightly, she sat across from him. "I'm Lisa Altimari. Who're you?"

"I am a prince." He replied, not even bothering to look up at her.

"Ok, then…" Eyebrow twitching a little, the girl tried again. "What's your name?"

"Prince Belphegor."

"It's nice to meet you, Prince Belphegor." Our protagonist mentally slapped herself for knowingly feeding the jerk's insufferable ego (by calling him 'Prince'), but decided it was worth it once he put down his weapon and started paying attention to her.

"Ushishishi… Good, you know your place." That little…

Lisa was grateful to god or science or whatever it is you believe in that Mr. Yamamoto and Mr. Superbi walked in at that moment; she wasn't sure what she would've done if they didn't.

The psychologist and the future Vongola Rain Guardian went up to his room to work on their assignment.

* * *

It happened when Lisa was walking down the stairs, on her way out - at around 5:30pm.

Decimo was sitting across from Mr. Belphegor, like she'd done a few hours prior, talking to him. The girl guessed Mr. Yamamoto invited him over and Mr. Belphegor let him in, but didn't call the swordsman out of laziness or lack of interest, leaving Decimo to awkwardly wait.

Using her Mist Flames to hide, Lisa sat at the bottom of the stairs and listened.

"You really killed your entire family?" the brunette asked, eyes wide with a mixture of horror and… sadness?

"Ushishishi… Yes. I wouldn't call them family, though; we didn't really talk." responded the blond boy, grin ever-present. Our protagonist had to wonder whether he regretted not getting to know them or not.

"Do you… regret not getting to know them?" Sawada Tsunayoshi would make a great psychologist.

"Ushishishishi… No way."

At this, Lisa got annoyed. How could he not care? Was that level of apathy even possible? Or was he lying?

Unlike the Italian girl, Decimo wasn't irritated. He just sat there, looking at Mr. Belphegor with sad eyes.

"Ushishi… Stop staring at me like that." The blond boy stood, rubbing at the eyes behind his ridiculously long bangs. "Seriously, stop it…"

Seeing tears start to fall down the prince's face, the psychologist's eyes widened in confused shock. What exactly was she watching?

Next thing Lisa knew, she was witnessing Decimo hug a crying Mr. Belphegor.

Maybe he knew what to do thanks to his experience with Mr. Gokudera's own family issues…

* * *

The next morning in class was… interesting, for lack of a better term.

It started out normal enough; Lisa got to class, sat at her place, was spoken to by Miss. Fujiko (who sits behind her)…

'Normal' then went straight to hell in a hand basket when Mr. Belphegor waltzed in and hugged Decimo. "Ushishishi… This is for yesterday."

Reactions varied; most of the class was shocked and confused (much like our protagonist the day before), Mr. Kozato and Mr. Gokudera looked like they'd seen a ghost, Miss. Sasagawa and Mr. Yamamoto's smiles became icy, some girls squealed, Decimo's brain seemed to have shut down, and Lisa… Lisa got out of there before Mr. Gokudera had a chance to recover and start blowing things up.

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**Thank you to anyone who read/followed/favorite/reviewed! :D**

**Looks like Lisa's learning how to handle the KHR characters. XD**


	15. Squalo Superbi

**Am I the only one who loves it when 'cool' characters are treated like the rest of the cast? It just makes them feel more believable to me. :L**

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_**Chapter 15:**_ Squalo Superbi

That Thursday was… interesting, for lack of a better term.

Once school ended, Lisa and Mr. Yamamoto went to his house to put the finishing touches on their art project. For the next hour, they worked quietly, the only disturbance being the elder Yamamoto bringing them some tea.

It was when the future Vongola Rain Guardian left for the bathroom that things got weird.

The blond was… confused, for lack of a better term, when Mr. Superbi walked in and sat down on the floor next to her. He seemed awkward and tense. Did he see through her illusions?

Choosing her actions carefully, Lisa smiled brightly at him. "I'm Lisa Altimari. What's your name?"

"…"

The lack of response sent alarm bells going off in her head. Wasn't Squalo Superbi supposed to be really loud? "… Are you ok?"

The boy seemed to snap out of whatever funk he was in and returned to his usual demeanor. "Squalo Superbi, trash!"

"Good to know." She winced at the volume, but at least he was back to his loud self. "So did you want anything?"

"…" Again with the silence treatment? What did he hope to gain?

"Mr. Superbi…?"

"…" He didn't _seem _like the type to think things through… Was he buying time for something?

"Is something wrong?"

By now Lisa was panicking. Was he ok? Did he have a suggestion for their project? Did he want to talk to her because they were both from Italy? Did he know she wasn't really some random preteen? Was he dying? At this point, she'd believe anything.

What was she going to do?

What _could_ she do?

What was wrong with-?

"HOW DOES DATING WORK?!"

Lisa facefaulted. Now it all made sense…

How was she not used to this by now?

* * *

"What have you done this time?" Lisa demanded of the demon baby sitting across from her. She was confronting him about yesterday's… 'incident' at the Sawadas' kitchen table.

"What do you mean?" Reborn responded, blank as ever.

"Mr. Superbi asked me for dating advice yesterday."

"Ah." She had to wonder if, under that ever-present deadpan, the hitman was amused. "You do know why the Varia is in Japan, don't you?"

"To get to know their boss." The girl crossed her arms. "I already guessed that you set Mr. Superbi and Decimo up to go somewhere and 'hang out'."

"Then what were you asking about?"

"Why would he ask Lisa Altimari, a random schoolgirl, for advice? Even if he came to the conclusion that girls are more interested in romance and that a classmate of Decimo's would know him, at least a little, there are better people to ask."

"He may have been embarrassed; asking about this kind of thing isn't like him, so someone who doesn't know what 'normal' is for him would be a more appealing choice."

"I see…" Lisa closed her eyes, filing away the information in her brain, before opening them again. "That makes sense."

"How did you react?"

"I didn't have a chance to; right after asking, he took it back, called me trash and stormed out."

"Typical Squalo."

The blond sighed at the former arcobaleno's words. "Your student sure has a talent for attracting people with problems…"

* * *

The next day, on Saturday, Lisa followed Mr. Superbi and Decimo to the aquarium. She was a little surprised to see no one else doing so, considering how many dangerous people are in love with Sawada Tsunayoshi, but decided to just chalk it up to Reborn's 'magic'.

Both boys seemed nervous (one because he thought it was like a date, the other because he was, as far as he knew, alone with an ax-crazy guy), but relaxed quite a bit after reaching the shark tank and the swordsman starting to explain why sharks are awesome (according to him, anyway).

The Italian girl couldn't help but smile upon seeing someone like the Varia's Rain Guardian, who's so used to taking life… live, for lack of a better term.

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**Thank you to anyone who read/followed/favorite/reviewed! :D**

**I wish we got to see more of the Varia acting like human beings in canon… =3=**


	16. Xanxus

**I really wish we got more Xanxus-Tsuna interaction in canon. It would've been interesting to see how the original authoress handled them together… =3=**

**Also, a heads up about what's going to happen from now on:**

**-School's starting tomorrow, so I'm gonna start taking a little longer to update. I'll still try to write whenever I can, though, and you'll get at least one or two chapters a week. n.n**

**-This is the last introduction chapter! Now we can get onto the multi-person, interaction-heavy chapters! Make sure to drop by any ideas or prompts you may have, 'k~? X3**

**P.S: I'm using comic book time for this fic. kthxbai ;9**

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**_Chapter 16:_** Xanxus

Lisa couldn't help but feel a pit form in her stomach whenever she saw the Varia's boss. He was a grade A jerk, that much she was sure of, but she just felt bad about all the things he's put himself through.

First his delusional mom gives him up, then he finds out he's adopted after several years of being sure he was going to be the Vongola Decimo, then he's frozen for eight years… Put bluntly, he's gone through things someone his age shouldn't have to. Even if the whole being frozen thing was his own fault, it was still sad.

What Lisa was the most upset about, though, had to be his destroyed relationship with Nono, _his dad_; the old man didn't have that much time left, and Mr. Xanxus was refusing to patch things up between them. And to top _that_ off, he had no idea how to build a friendship with other people; it was _depressing_.

So, Lisa concluded, having Mr. Xanxus spend time with the future Decimo was a good idea; if a fluffy ball of cuteness couldn't help him, she didn't know what could.

* * *

Lisa wasn't completely sure how Reborn convinced Mr. Xanxus and Decimo to go to the park together, but decided the result mattered more than how it was achieved.

The girl was hiding behind the bench they were sitting on, listening in on… well… the brunette shaking in fear in one corner and the black-haired boy looking irritated in the other. This was going to be a long afternoon…

"Uh… Xanxus?" After a few excruciatingly boring minutes (in which Lisa almost fell asleep), the younger of the two seemed to have calmed down, willing himself to try making friends with the other.

"What?" snapped the Varia's boss.

Decimo flinched, but pressed on. The blond had to admit, his resolve was impressive. "How have things been with Ninth?"

"Why do you care, trash?" Lisa could swear his glare faltered for a moment.

"I guess… I just do." The boy smiled sadly. "He really does love you. You're his son, Xanxus – the only son he has left."

Mr. Xanxus turned his glare from the other to the ground, anger simmering down to something Lisa could only recognize as self-loathing. "This isn't your problem, scum."

"Yes, it is. It became my problem when you made the Ring Battles happen." That kind determination in Sawada Tsunayoshi's eyes… was that what Reborn always tried to bring out?

They sat in choking silence for a few minutes before the older boy found his voice again. "What's _your_ relationship with your dad?"

"He let me think he was dead for two years..." Decimo sighed.

Lisa couldn't help but smile when Mr. Xanxus burst out laughing.

* * *

It made Lisa beam like a sugar-high mass of light to watch the two boys talking (even if Xanxus was still throwing insults here and there); she didn't even realize it was getting dark until Decimo suggested they start making their way home.

The blond waited until they were gone, then sat herself down on the bench. Not too long after, a certain hitman took a seat next to her.

"So what do you think of my student?" asked the baby.

"He certainly is something." the girl chuckled. "Mind if I make a quick phone call?"

"Go ahead."

Quickly pulling out her phone and dialing the number, Lisa put the communication device to her ear.

"Hello?" came the man's response.

"I have an update on Mr. Xanxus."

"Really?" Nono's voice took on a warm yet sad sound to it at the mention of his son.

"Yeah. You can be expecting a call from him in the near future."

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**Thank you to anyone who read/followed/favorite/reviewed! :D**

**I rewrote this stupid thing twice. ;_;**

**Also, I think I found a song describing Xanxus really well. ._.**

**It's called 'Terror(ism)', and JubyPhonic has a great English cover of it. n.n**


	17. In Which Lisa Finally Talks to Tsuna

**I hate school. So much. e_e**

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_**Chapter 17:**_ In Which Lisa Finally Talks to Tsuna

It wasn't long after Lisa handed in her report on the last of the Varia when she realized that for all her knowledge on him, she's never once actually spoken to Decimo.

The situation wasn't really so bad; she'd already got more than enough information from his interactions with the people around him. It just felt like… like she was missing out. He _has_ solved the personality problems of the severely messed up people he associates with, after all; something a professional psychologist (stalker) was struggling with.

She was going to talk to Sawada 'Tsuna' Tsunayoshi whether he liked it or not.

And so her little misadventure began…

* * *

It wasn't supposed to be so… hard.

Lisa had been quietly following Decimo, Mr. Yamamoto and Mr. Gokudera, thinking there was no point in hiding since her apartment was that way too, and waiting for the right moment to approach when it happened.

Deciding to walk up to them after seeing the three turn a corner, the girl sped up. She was finally going to have a conversation with the future mafia boss who might as well be a psychologist!

…

Right? No? Figures.

Unfortunately, our heroine had already wasted her share of luck for the month.

"Kufufu…" Freezing at the familiar sound, Lisa slowly turned to face Rokudo Mukuro. "Why are you following Sawada Tsunayoshi?"

Plastering on a strained smile, she spoke as confidently as she could in her current state of mind. "I'm not. My place is just the same way as his."

"Don't try denying it. I see through you."

Panic quickly settling in, the Italian could only stare at him with wide eyes. For how long did he know?

"Who are you and why are you following Sawada Tsunayoshi." It wasn't a question. It was an order.

But she couldn't just tell Mr. Rokudo she was analyzing (stalking) Decimo and those he associates with for Vongola… Reborn would have her skinned alive! Or worse! She had to think of _something_… She'd followed him for a while; there HAD to be something she could use to-

Then it hit her.

"I know you touch Decimo's butt when you spar."

"Kufufufufu… So that's how it is."

The man left Lisa to her business with only a blood-chilling glare as a warning of what he'd do to her if she ever even _tried_ to harm Sawada Tsunayoshi.

* * *

The next day at lunch, Lisa walked up to Decimo, the brightest smile she could muster plastered to her face. Learning a lesson from the Muku-moe incident, she decided to approach him at school.

"Mr. Sawada?" she greeted.

"Huh?" Turning from his two friends, he blinked at her in confusion. Pointing to himself, he asked, "Me?"

"Yes. I've recently noticed that even though I've been going to this school for a while, I've never spoken to you."

"Oh…" He was awkward, but gave her a heart-meltingly warm smile nonetheless. "That's really-"

"Who do you think you are, talking casually to Tenth like that?!" growled a certain silverette, successfully getting the entire classes' attention.

Oops, guess she forgot about Decimo's puppy…

"Haha, calm down, Gokudera; Lisa was just saying hi." laughed the baseball player before either Lisa or the brunette could attempt to calm the other boy down, but the psychologist still noticed the edge to his smile. He didn't trust her.

Needless to say, the aggravated bomber soon did what he did best; he made things go boom.

* * *

Lisa sighed, looking through the cabinets for bandages.

Thanks to Decimo's quick reflexes, he managed to get her out of the way in time with only a few bruises to show for it. Really, that kindness was going to kill him some day...

Still, she was grateful; someone who understood what a precious miracle life is was a rare sight in the mafia world. As thanks, she offered to help him at the infirmary, since it was Shamal's day off and she had basic knowledge of how to wrap a bandage.

The friends of his who were present for the incident were waiting outside, despite being asked not to follow. Lisa had to admit, their concern was adorable.

What she was looking for in hand, the girl turned to the brunette sitting on the bed. Plopping herself down next to him, she began taking care of his injuries as best she could (which, admittedly, wasn't very well).

"Your friends are really something…" she sighed, thinking back to everything she'd seen while following them.

"Yeah…" The boy exhaled a tired sigh of his own. "But…" To the psychologist's quiet wonder, a soft smile lit his face. "I wouldn't give them up for anything."

As she watched the future Vongola Decimo exit and greet his concerned loved ones, she couldn't help but let a smile of her own escape, small and fond.

"And they wouldn't give _you_ up for anything. Sawada Tsunayoshi, you truly are lucky."

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**Thank you to anyone who read/followed/favorite/reviewed! :D**

**Muku-moe is a nickname HalcyonNight came up with. n.n**

**Tsuna's moe is the most moe moe in the history of ever, dough. U.U**


	18. In Which Lisa Worries for Tsuna's Safety

**I wish more fanfic recs would show up on the KHR page on TvTropes… I've got nothing to read… |||OTL**

**If you guys have any suggestions, make sure to tell me, please? TTuTT**

**Also, this chapter's rated T for the thing Lisa freaks out over. n.n**

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_**Chapter 18:**_ In Which Lisa Worries for Tsuna's Safety

Lisa stared at the TV screen in disbelief, thoroughly disturbed.

She honestly didn't think much of it when Reborn gave her footage from the Ring Battles, watching it as soon as she got home from school. To be honest, she didn't find the first or second fights too interesting; following the participants had already told her all they could and more. The third fight, the one for the Storm Ring, was where things got… interesting, for lack of a better term.

It started out just like the others, but then, towards the end… the girl was pretty sure Mr. Belphegor was trying to rape Mr. Gokudera.

Turning off the television, our protagonist curled up into a little ball of stress on the couch, thoughts racing around her head like sugar-high ninjas. The process in which she reached a conclusion went something like this:

Step 1: Mr. Belphegor is mentally unstable

Step 2: Mr. Belphegor tried to rape Mr. Gokudera (?)

Step 3: Mr. Belphegor likes Decimo

Step 4: ?

Step 5: Mr. Belphegor is going to try to rape Decimo

Lisa would argue the panic attack that followed was completely justified.

* * *

Lisa could barely concentrate on anything the next day. She was probably being paranoid, she knew that, but that's just the way she was; ever since she was little, overthinking even the smallest things would later come back to bite her.

So, with that information in mind, it shouldn't be hard to predict her reaction to the following situation.

"Remember the Disney princess that was here a while ago?" asked Miss. Fujiko- no, _Naomi_, as she wanted to be called, during lunch.

The blond's eyebrows furled in confusion. "Disney princess?"

"Tiara Boy."

"Ah." The nickname would have been amusing if she wasn't currently freaking out about Mr. Belphegor. "Yes, I do."

"I saw him at a stuffed animals shop while looking for a present for my baby cousin's birthday last weak."

Lisa did a double take, staring at the other as if she'd grown a second head and started Cossack dancing. "Wat."

"Yeah. Wonder what he was there for…" Naomi bit into her rice ball, absently chewing on it.

"What was he looking at?" Mind racing, the psychologist stared the Japanese girl down with serious eyes.

Unfortunately, Fujiko Naomi has the atmosphere-reading skills of a drunk toddler.

"A brown teddy bear with orange eyes and an orange ribbon around its neck! It was so cute, I would've totally bought it if I didn't already spend my allowance!"

Tuning out the black-haired girl's fangirling of all that is 'cute', Lisa stared down at the sandwich in her hands with quiet panic, trying to piece together the information she had.

What could Mr. Belphegor want a teddy bear for? What would he do with it? Could it have anything to do with the cause of her most recent freak out? Maybe following (stalking) him again would help her understand… But what if she got caught? Decimo's Mist and Rain Guardians already distrust her, she couldn't-

"That sandwich must be really interesting."

"Huh?" The Italian girl snapped to attention, blinking at the other.

"You've been staring at it like it holds the answers to life, the universe and everything, so it _has_ to be interesting."

Lisa facepalmed. Whether it was because of Fujiko Naomi's thought process or her own stupidity is up for debate.

* * *

In the end, Lisa went with one of her less complicated tactics:

Being straightforward.

"So _that's_ what he's been up to…" sighed the former Arcobaleno, shaking his head. The blond had asked to meet him in the coffee shop she's clamed as her interrogation territory once school was done for the day (with our protagonist paying, of course).

"So what does it mean?" The paranoid girl knew Mammon was the closest thing to a parent Mr. Belphegor has ever had; no one knew him better than he did. Whatever information the conversation brought would be what she'd base her actions on.

"That I need to give Bel the talk."

Lisa's jaw went slack. "Wat."

The other rolled his eyes. "What you saw from the Storm Ring Battle may have _looked_ compromising, but it couldn't have been; Bel doesn't know how babies are made."

"He's _sixteen_!" This was unbelievable. Completely, absolutely unbelievable.

"So?" Mammon sipped his drink. "I wouldn't be surprised if Lussuria and I were the only ones in the Varia who understood reproduction; in case you haven't noticed, the people I work with don't know much about anything outside of their job."

"Point taken…" The blue-eyed girl sighed. "So what about the teddy bear?"

"My guess is he found it cute; it probably reminded him of Reborn's student."

Despite her attempts at staying serious, a dumb smile found its way to our protagonist's face. "Did he buy it?"

"He refused to part with it for the first few days."

Unsurprisingly, the image of an elite assassin carrying a stuffed toy around made Lisa burst out laughing. She'd later mentally smack herself for overthinking something insignificant again, but for now she was laughing.

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**Thank you to anyone who read/followed/favorited/reviewed! :D**

**Am I the only one who thinks Mammon's like the Varia's mom? I dunno why it's a headcanon of mine… = .=**


	19. The Talk

**This isn't really a chapter; that's why it doesn't follow the theme naming I've got going on. This is an omake. n.n**

**Guys, this fic gave someone an idea for fanart. My life is complete. ;u;**

**Also, I have a request:**

**I need ideas of how to involve Ryohei in this fic more. A good friend of mine likes him a lot, but I just don't have any ideas. Please help? |||OTL**

**WARNING: This chapter is rated K+; the Varia gets the talk, but you readers don't. n.n**

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_**Chapter 19/omake 1:**_ The Talk

"Wat."

It came out sounding dumber than Mammon would have liked, but he'd argue that it was completely justified; the reports he was recently mailed, the ones about the rest of the Varia, needed to be seen to be believed, after all.

He'd already suspected that Bel was in love for the first time; his conversation with Lisa earlier that day just confirmed it and told him who it was that his friend/unofficial adoptive child liked. But to think that Squalo and Xanxus were also interested in Reborn's student… The situation just kept getting more absurd.

Facepalming, the former Arcobaleno stared at the ceiling from his position lying stomach-up on his bed. Has it seriously come to this?

Did he really have to give the other Varia members the talk?

He should really be getting paid for this…

* * *

Mammon sighed, taking a quick look around the Sawadas' living room; for reasons unknown, the house had somehow become the ideal meeting place for… well… everybody. It probably had something to do with how Nana treated anyone who needed a hug as her own child and Reborn's student treated everyone with genuine respect, unlike the artificial kind a certain psychologist he knew did.

After blackmailing Lisa into keeping Lussuria busy (he wasn't heartless enough to let his friends' innocence be butchered by the man, after all), convincing Reborn to not eavesdrop with some help from Nono (he wasn't doing this for the sadist's entertainment, dammit) and rounding up the rest of the Varia, the psychic had let the four settle down before speaking.

Deciding he's wasted enough time already, the purple-haired boy got started.

"Do any of you know how babies are made?"

Squalo, Bel and Levi exchanged confused looks, but Xanxus was confident as ever.

"What kind of question is that, trash?" Of course his boss would know. What was he thinking? "A crane brings them!"

The following facefault, Mammon thought, would give even Lisa's a run for their money.

Standing up, he reintroduced his palm and face. "No, boss, that isn't how it works; that's just something parents tell their children until they're old enough to understand."

He might have found the look of shock on the other's face a little bit too amusing... Not that he showed it.

Needless to say, by the end of the conversation, four out of five of the room's occupants were scarred for life.

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**Thank you to anyone who read/followed/favorited/reviewed! :D**

**I had way too much fun writing this… XD**

**Am I the only one who thinks it's poetic irony that people who spend so much time ending life wouldn't know much about its creation? :^**


	20. In Which People Learn Things (?)

**20 chapters! Milestone achieved! }:D**

**I would've said something when this fic hit 50 reviews or when it was added to a community, but I was so happy that my brain short-circuited. Sorry. ;u;**

**Also, very important:**

_**THE IDEA FOR THIS CHAPTER CAME FROM HALCYONNIGHT'S STORY, COLORE DELLA NEBIA!**_

**(See, Halcyon? I really did make the credits as attention-grabbing as possible. 8'D)**

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_**Chapter 20: **_In Which People Learn Things (?)

Lisa knew she should have just taken Naomi up on her offer to walk home together, missing pencil case be damned; it's the stupid object's fault she was stuck sitting on the steps to the school's entrance, watching a fight between Mr. Hibari and Mr. Rokudo (that was blocking the way out). She didn't even know how it started; it was already like that when she walked out of the building, pencil case found.

After around an hour of waiting, she'd finally caved in, calling Reborn to ask for Decimo to come and calm them down. Despite her not wanting to owe the sadist, she felt relief wash over her when the brunette showed up and got them to stop; she'd have to thank Reborn for bringing out the boy's charisma, at least a little.

The girl was almost out the gate when a certain prefect's voice stopped her dead in her tracks.

"You're not allowed on school grounds this late, herbivore."

That little… It was his and Mr. Rokudo's fault she was still there in the first place!

Sense of self-preservation faltering in favor of built-up irritation, Lisa did the stupidest thing she could have possibly done.

She talked back to Hibari Kyoya.

"Oh, shut it! I bet you don't even know what herbivore means!"

The realization of what she'd just done and the following silence proved to be an excellent opportunity to run.

* * *

"Gah, I hate that stupid club!" raged Naomi, dropping herself onto her seat with a thud.

Lisa raised an eyebrow. "What club?"

"The one my stupid brother founded! He barely comes home anymore, and I swear it's made him an even bigger jerk than before!"

Our protagonist thought it best to tune out and nod along until the bell rang; she wasn't particularly interested in the Fujiko family. The other girl did, however, bring up some family-related questions.

Hibari Kyoya was the only future Vongola Guardian she didn't have the nerve to follow all the way home, and therefore the only future Vongola Guardian whose family she was unaware of.

Filling away the thought for a later date, the blond blinked. Why did Naomi stop talking? Had the bell gone? Come to think of it, the whole class was-

Oh, fudge nuggets.

There, in the seat next to Sawada Tsunayoshi, sat an even more serious than usual-looking Hibari Kyoya (who'd probably been given the place after briefly glancing at the student previously occupying it).

Reactions varied; those who knew Hibari a bit better (Decimo and company) looked confused, most of the students looked like they were going to wet themselves, Miss. Tachibana and Miss. Tanaka had recovered from the shock of the situation and began whispering to each other, Naomi blinked like a clueless owl, and Lisa… Lisa wasn't quite sure how she was supposed to react.

She had to pity the poor teacher who'd be teaching them the first period.

Why just the first period?

Mr. Hibari only stuck around for the first period.

For science class.

In which they reviewed their notes on food chains.

And in which Mr. Hibari invaded an oblivious Decimo's personal space.

Later, Lisa would assume looking at the brunette's notes was only half the reason for that.

* * *

Kanna stared down at her bento thoughtfully, going over the morning's events in her head.

"Do you think…" she began, her best friend's gaze redirected from her own lunch to herself. "That maybe Hibari doesn't know what herbivore actually means?"

"I wouldn't be surprised." Megumi waved her hand dismissively. "If he doesn't see the inappropriate implications of his catchphrase, I doubt he'd know. He probably thought it was synonymous with 'weak'."

"You're probably right… but there's something else bothering me."

The slightly shorter girl nibbled on her rice ball absently. "What is it?"

"I just can't shake the feeling that Hibari likes Dame Tsuna."

Megumi choked on her rice ball.

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**Thank you to anyone who read/followed/favorited/reviewed! :D**

**Does anyone even remember Kanna and Megumi? They haven't shown up in over ten chapters. Namiko too, I think, and Yoko, Luke, Rosa and Michiru have barely been introduced… Naomi's the only OC, apart from Lisa, that's gotten fleshed out, isn't she? But the canon characters are who we should **_**really**_** be thinking about, so it's all good~ ;9**


	21. The First Generation

**Another omake. :D**

**I just really wanted to write a bit about the first generation, y'know? =3=**

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_**Chapter 21/omake 2: **_The First Generation

Two transparent figures stood at Namimori Middle's gates, watching the students pour out; one a gentle, light blue-eyed blond in a simple, light pink old-fashioned dress, the other a graceful dark blue-eyed woman in a turquoise, floral kimono, her black hair flowing down in a similar way to the first's.

"He really does resemble Giotto." commented the blond, Elena, as a certain brunette and his companions past them by.

"In more ways than one." Despite her best efforts, a bitter smile found is way to the deceased Japanese girl's face. After all, the only reason Vongola Primo – or Ieyasu Sawada, as he had introduced himself – married her all those years ago was because she was the only one forward about her feelings for him and he didn't know how to refuse; he never saw her as more than a friend.

The Italian chuckled. "Yes, it would seem he has just as much talent in… 'attracting' people. Is there anyone you're cheering for in the competition to win your great, great, great grandson's heart, Chinatsu?"

The black-haired woman considered for a moment. "No, not really… Maybe that Kyoko girl."

"I knew that rotten cheese prank would earn her your favor..." Elena sighed, shaking her head.

Rolling her eyes, the other crossed her arms. "Well who do _you_ think would be the best match for my great, great, great grandson?"

A huge, blindingly bright smile stretched across the blond's face. "Mukuro, of course; just like I want Daemon to win Giotto's heart."

"Figures…" It was now Chinatsu's turn to sigh and shake her head. "Shouldn't you react a bit… differently to your old lover falling for a friend of yours?"

"You know it's been a long time since Daemon and I have seen each other that way, even if it took him a while to realize it; we're just better off as friends. It's not like our dear Vongola Primo's other Guardians and Cozart don't like him like that, anyway; you yourself know how easy it is to fall prey to his oblivious charm." The Italian's smile turned somewhat cat-ish. "And Daemon and Giotto do look adorable together…"

"… You've been reading yaoi manga again, haven't you?"

Elena ran off cackling like the old witch that she was, leaving an exasperated Chinatsu to run after her, tripping over her own kimono every few steps.

She'd have to consider getting more flexible clothing if she continued spending time with the only woman who could scold the first generation Vongola and get away with it.

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**Thank you to anyone who read/followed/favorited/reviewed! :D**

**You can expect to see the first generation ghosts showing up in more omakes. Feel free to make requests for situations involving them as well. X3**


	22. Moms are Scary

**I'm thinking of starting a DRRR fic, but I swear it's not going to upset my updating schedule! TT^TT**

**Also, did you know that the guest user 'concerned mom' really is my mom? :^**

**That's right, peeps. My mom watches KHR. What does **_**your**_** mom watch? :P**

**(Ok, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have our moms into this conversation… |||OTL)**

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_**Chapter 22/omake 3:**_ Moms are Scary

Lisa raised an eyebrow, not believing Naomi had the brain capacity to do what she claimed to. She'd been babysitting Fran, I-pin, Lambo and Fuuta, hearing the louder sounds produced by the four playing upstairs from her position on the Sawadas' couch, when the other girl called.

"You know Mandarin?" the Italian spoke into the cellphone.

"Well, sort of. Dad's Chinese and proud of his ancestry, so he's making my siblings and I learn; Yoko and I are still struggling with the basics, but Mr. Meanie Pants," – the Fujiko family's middle child and Naomi's slightly-more-of-a-jerk-than-Yoko older brother – "Is already fluent. Fluent! I mean, seriously? I know Yoko and I aren't the smartest people around," ('no matter what Yoko thinks of herself' was left unsaid) "But he shouldn't be fluent!"

"Naomi," Eyebrow twitching slightly, our protagonist wanted to get the conversation over with; she could understand her 'friend's' desire to vent, but wasn't anywhere near close enough to her to care. "At what ages did you, him and Yoko start learning?"

"… All of us started learning at seven…"

Lisa facepalmed.

That was, in all honesty, pathetic. Even by Naomi and Yoko's standard.

The discussion was, however, brought to an unceremonious end when Mrs. Sawada returned from her grocery shopping.

"Thank you for looking after the kids; I really do appreciate it." beamed the housewife, sorting through the bags she'd carried to the kitchen.

"It's really no problem." The blond smiled back, kneeling beside the older woman to help, quietly hoping her paranoid uneasiness around her didn't show.

"Would you tell me your name now, then?"

Lisa paused, confused. "But you already know my name, Mrs. Sawada… It's Lisa Al-"

"I meant your real one."

A cold, uncomfortable swept the room, mirroring Lisa's panicked state of mind.

How did she know?

"It's alright; you don't have to tell me if you don't want to. Just make sure my Tsu-kun doesn't get into too much trouble, and I'll be content." The Japanese looked down at the pear in her hand with sad eyes. "My son… he's never had a family before, really. A father who's never around and a mother who constantly belittles him aren't exactly the ideal parents." The woman let out a bitter chuckle. "I wish he trusted me, but I don't blame him for not."

Panic and confusion pushed aside for the moment, the Italian continued with sorting the various bags' contents. "Not that I don't feel for you, but why are you telling me all this?"

"Because you're a neutral party, I suppose, and I have a request I doubt you'd refuse."

Freezing at the killing intent the other had started emitting, Lisa's head jerked up, blue eyes meeting brown.

"If any of them hurt my baby in any way, shape or form, _let me know immediately_."

As Sawada Nana returned to her cheerful disposition, all our protagonist could do was nod dumbly.

Suddenly, the blond was very, very scared for those with romantic interest in the woman's son; something told her she wouldn't accept anything but the best for him.

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**Thank you to anyone who read/followed/favorited/reviewed! :D**

**Mothers are scary when it comes to protecting their kids. Seriously, don't mess with them. ;n;**


	23. In Which Megumi is Confused

**This chapter had to be rewritten way too many times. My brain hurts. 8'D**

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_**Chapter 23:**_ In Which Megumi is Confused

Tanaka Megumi was no idiot. Not as perceptive as Lisa (a professional stalker) or Namiko (an alien-obsessed nut-job), disrespectful to perfectly nice people and a shameless fangirl, but no idiot.

Which is exactly why she was so very, very confused upon seeing the occupants of the Sawada family's home. Next time she got stuck paired with Dame Tsuna for a project, they were _so_ doing it at her place…

And so the adventure begins.

* * *

In all honesty, Megumi was optimistic as she rang the doorbell to Dame Tsuna's house that Saturday mid-day; yes, she'd be spending her day with him, but there was always the chance Yamamoto and/or Gokudera were at his house, and just the thought of that made her heart skip a beat.

As the door opened to reveal a young boy, the girl smiled brightly, only to frown when she realized that boy was most definitely not Japanese, and therefore couldn't be Dame Tsuna's sibling.

"Are you the girl Tsuna-nii is working on an assignment with?" he asked. If he called her classmate 'brother', maybe he was adopted?

Pushing the question to the back of her mind, Megumi returned to her cheerful disposition. "Yes, I am. What's your name?"

"Fuuta."

"It's nice to meet you, Fuuta. Can I come in?"

He gave her a look she would peg as suspicion if it didn't come from a young child before opening the door wider so she could walk through.

If she was a little more considerate, she would have realized _why_ Fuuta gave her that look; from what he's seen of his Tsuna-nii's classmates, they were jerks (and/or in the mafia).

* * *

Megumi expected a lot of things to be on the other side of Dame Tsuna's room's door.

Her classmate struggling with some piece of homework at his desk was one.

A hot foreign guy laying on the bed and reading some manga like he owned the place wasn't.

"Leave, trash." The older boy sent her an angry glare, setting off alarms yelling 'DANGER! DANGER!' in her head.

"U-um…" On instinct, she took a step back. This person reminded her way too much of Hibari… "W-what about the project…?"

"R-right!" Dame Tsuna moved to stand between them, trying to defuse the situation before anyone (namely, Megumi) got hurt. "Do you mind working in the living room?"

"N-no, I don't, Dame Tsu-" Feeling the foreigner's glare intensify, the Japanese girl corrected herself. "Mr. Tsuna."

In Megumi's book, the hot but scary guy ignoring her after that was a good thing.

* * *

As soon as she got home, this chapter's protagonist called her best friend.

"Kanna?"

"Yeah, Megumi?"

"We should probably stop calling people by derogatory nicknames."

"Why?"

"Because you never know what kind of nut-job might have a crush on them."

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**Thank you to anyone who read/followed/favorited/reviewed! :D**

**Alternative chapter title: **In Which Megumi and Kanna Learn to Respect Our Tuna Fish (and Anyone Else They'd Usually be Jerks to)

**Next chapter will have Ryohei, I swear! TT^TT**

**#i'mtrying**

**#halcyondon'tkillmeplz**

**#deadpeoplecan'twrite**


	24. In Which There is Ryohei

**FINALLY! I FINALLY MANAGE TO INCLUDE RYOHEI! ;A;**

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_**Chapter 24: **_In Which There is Ryohei

Miruhara Namiko was, admittedly, an idiot. Of the proud variety. Where Lisa or Megumi would be compelled by their sense of self-preservation to run with their tail between their legs or Naomi would be reduced to a crying mess the danger would consider too pathetic to deal with, she'd plow on and most likely get herself screwed over.

To her credit, though, she was perceptive.

Perceptive enough to notice the air of otherness about certain people.

And that's yet another reason why life is so fond of throwing her into situations anyone else would have the common sense to stay away from.

* * *

"Sasagawa Ryohei, captain and only member of the boxing club." Namiko greeted her upperclassman in the almost-deserted hallway. She didn't like him, in all honesty; he was too hyper, and it bothered her that she wasn't the only one benefitting from the student council's decision to let one-person clubs be considered official. Still, he didn't seem like the type to keep his mouth shut, so she might as well take advantage of him.*****

The boy turned from the wild-haired first year he was talking to – the kendo club's Taiki, if she remembered correctly. "That is extremely me." His eyes suddenly lit up, somehow doing the same to the immediate vicinity. "DO YOU WANT TO JOIN THE BOXING CLUB?"

Flinching at his volume, the bespectacled preteen continued. "No, I actually have some questions regarding your relationship to Dame Tsuna."

The white-haired boy visibly deflated for a short moment before returning to his cheerful disposition, distracting Namiko from how the third wheel's big, black eyes sparkled in a way too similar to his sister's for comfort. "What do you extremely want to know? And please don't call Sawada that; Taiki was just telling me how it wasn't an affectionate nickname."

"Sis says respecting Upperclassman Tsuna will make your life longer." Her black-haired underclassman crossed his arms across his chest, nodding sagely.

Ignoring them both, she fired away her questions. "Why do you and Kyoko spend so much time with him?"

"Upperclassman Kyoko's in love with him and Upperclassman Ryohei wants him to join the boxing club." Almost as an afterthought, the youngest of the three added "Upperclassman Ryohei likes redheads******, so I'm fairly certain whatever attraction there is on his part is platonic."

Namiko gaped at the boy for his unnerving straightforwardness.

Ryohei gaped at the boy because he had no idea Kyoko liked Tsuna.

* * *

"Taiki, what have you done?" Megumi asked her younger brother on the way home.

"Today? Quit kendo and joined the boxing club because it looked like more fun." the boy answered, paying more attention to the sky above than the question.

She rolled her eyes. "I knew _that_. I meant 'What have you done to Kyoko's brother?'"

"What makes you ask?"

"I caught him wondering aloud whether Tsuna or Kyoko would wear the dress in a wedding between the two. You're the only person I know who could make someone have these kinds of thoughts."

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*****Have I mentioned how I hate this OC with all of my hate? ._.

******I WILL GO DOWN WITH THIS SHIP! TT^TT (Ryohei/Alex)

**RYOHEI WILL BE BACK. EVENTUALLY. TT^TT**

**How this chapter's OC looks:**

_Tanaka Taiki – same eyes as Megumi, wild, black hair, a bit on the short side_


	25. In Which Muku-moe Gets Vaccinated

**I got this idea while my mom, my dad, my brother and I were getting vaccinated. My brother **_**does not**_** like sharp, pointy things. ._.**

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_**Chapter 25:**_ In Which Muku-moe Gets Vaccinated

Shamal couldn't help but pity the boy sitting on the nurse's office's bed, the uneasy glances he was sending the needle being prepared not going unnoticed; Mukuro didn't have a very good past with such things, after all.

Quite frankly, he didn't want to be the one giving him his vaccine shot. On top of his dislike of treating men, there was always the possibility of the illusionist lashing out. Unfortunately, the choice wasn't his to make; between Reborn's threats and Tsuna's pleading, he wasn't left with much room to argue.

"This will only take a second." promised the doctor, turning to face the Mist with the needle in hand.

The other only smiled that creepy smile of his as a response.

Shamal's trained eyes had no trouble picking up on how hard he was trying not to bolt out of there.

* * *

Outside, in the hallway, stood a very worried Tsuna and Chrome. Ken and Chikusa would have also been there, but they knew Mukuro wouldn't want them to see him afraid – _weak_ – and left as soon as they got vaccinated.

And besides, they weren't exactly fond of needles either.

"He'll be ok." the brunet assured, to himself as much as the other, his eyes confident in his words and scared all at once.

Chrome smiled softly. "Yes… He's strong. He'll be ok." Boss?"

"Yeah?"

"Mukuro-sama really trusts you; that's why he doesn't mind you seeing him at his lowest. He knows you can build him back up.

Tsuna could feel his eyes widening and cheeks heating. He knew he was getting closer to the more closed-off members of his group of friends, but it was still a bit… weird, for lack of a better term, to hear it said out loud.

"He…" If he didn't know her, he would have thought her smile took on a manipulative, very Mukuro-ish edge to it. "Really cares about you. A lot."

"I… I'm just glad he's opening up…" The brunet wringed his hands, not really sure how he was supposed to react.

Chrome sighed. "You really are clueless, Boss…"

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**Thank you to anyone who read/followed/favorited/reviewed! :D**

**Dammit, why can I not write a decent-length Muku-moe-centric chapter?! Damn you, Muku-moe! D:{**

**Also, am I the only one with the headcanon that the Kokuyo Gang eats healthier when Mukuro's around? He just seems more responsible to me. :^**


	26. Change

**So, yeah, funny story, I'm kinda sorta obsessed with Obito x Kakashi (Naruto shipping) ATM and am having a hard time finding good material so… help? Eh heh… heh… I am so sorry. |||OTL**

**Anyway, on to the story! 'n_n**

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_**Chapter 26/omake 4: **_Change

When Naomi was little, her and her big brother were introduced to superhero shows.

Back then, it just seemed so… so… incredible. After all, why would those men wearing panties over their pants be willing to risk their lives for the innocent? It made a big impact on the three- and five-year-olds.

Before they knew it, they were using scarves as capes and wearing underwear wrong; he was the cool Batman and she was the comic-relief Robin and everything was right with the world. He'd help kitties stuck in trees and she'd help old ladies cross the road, laughing like idiots when Yoko called them silly, because they knew they weren't; they were keeping Namimori safe.

Naomi didn't even care when he tried to act like he didn't like cute things even though he obviously did; it must be a boy thing, she reasoned.

* * *

When Naomi was five, things started to change.

Her big brother was picking fights with the other kids, which she didn't see a problem with because they were really mean, but the teachers and their parents got upset with him for some reason.

He started giving her that look every time she cried – which was, admittedly, often – and using big words she didn't understand and maybe he didn't either. He made friends with this scary looking guy who she had a hard time believing was their age – Tetsu-something – and eventually wouldn't smile anymore. He stayed at Tetsu-something's house more and more often and picking more fights and, in a twisted sort of way, seemed _happy_.

She didn't know how she was supposed to feel about it.

* * *

When Naomi was seven, the world was different. _Too _different.

The adults were scared of her brother, even mom and dad and Yoko were. He was… weird. He started fighting anyone and everyone for the stupidest reasons – like being in a group or looking at him the wrong way – and using _weapons_ and he barely talked to her anymore.

The last straw was when he changed his name and made his moving out official.

"Why are you doing this?!" she demanded, using a tone anyone with a brain would know not to with him.

Next thing she knew, she was in the hospital and very, very afraid, that stupid catchphrase of his still ringing in her head.

* * *

By the time he started up that stupid club of glorified delinquents, Naomi couldn't bring herself to care. So what if he was nothing but a bully? She knew he was completely alone inside, and it brought her a sickening sense of satisfaction.

She wanted to throw up at the thought, but maybe they really weren't so different after all.

* * *

It was during her first year of middle school that things got weird.

That one kid with the funny hair who couldn't do anything right started hanging around with this really scary baby, and suddenly, her brother seemed interested in another human being again. (Not that she was completely convinced either her brother or the baby were human, mind you.)

She reasoned it was because of the sheer ridiculousness of it all that, but that didn't change the fact that by the next year, her big brother, dare she say it, _made a friend_. In his own twisted way, that is.

And it didn't stop there.

There were all these crazy people practically gravitating around her classmate, that it would have been weird if her brother _hadn't _made friends. He mostly just fought, but they didn't seem to mind.

He found a place where he belonged.

(His alliance with the redhead in her class with the Band-Aids constantly on his face for some reason would never make sense to her.)

* * *

"I swear to god, Sawada isn't human." Naomi sighed, plopping herself down in her seat unceremoniously.

"Why?" Lisa raised an eyebrow from her won seat, turning to face the other.

"Kyoya talked to me yesterday." As an afterthought, she added "And he didn't kill me."

Compression dawned on the Italian's face. "Oh…" Then disinterest. "Yep, that was definitely Mr. Sawada's work." Then she just looked confused. "Wait, why would Mr. Hibari need to…?"

"Remember when I said my brother may be Satan?"

"You were serious?!"

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**Thank you to anyone who read/followed/favorited/reviewed! :D**

**Here, have a headcanon. 3:**


	27. Halloween Special

**Yes, it's late, but Halloween's too much fun an occasion to not have a special for. Up yours, calendar! 8'D**

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_**Chapter 27/special 1: **_Halloween

Lisa, in all honesty, hated Halloween. Not really because of the people in skimpy clothes; she could handle _that_. It was her uncanny ability to get stuck babysitting trick-or-treating kids that made her want to scream bloody murder.

Which brings us to this year's Halloween, in which our protagonist has somehow gotten stuck to babysitting not only Lambo, I-pin, Fuuta, and Fran, but also the tenth generation Vongola, the Varia (minus Mammon), the Kokuyo Gang, Dino (who decided Halloween was the perfect time to drop by for a visit), Mr. Spanner, Mr. Irie, Miss. Sasagawa, Miss. Miura, the boxing club (who's only member other than Mr. Sasagawa was Miss. Tanaka's brother), Miss. Tanaka (whose brother dragged along), Miss. Taniguchi (who came with Miss. Tanaka), and the Fujiko sisters.

She didn't really know where the other (sort of) responsible adults had gone off to, but she really couldn't care less.

Unless she found a way to somehow strangle Reborn, that is, because it was all the stupid baby's fault. It was _always_ the stupid baby's fault.

It was strange, but, somehow, she'd found a partner in misery; Miss. Tanaka. It wasn't that surprising, considering how the girl's gotten so much less obnoxious over the last while (proving that fear is the best medicine), and how Miss. Taniguchi probably had more in common with Naomi.

Girls were fickle, after all, and the twin-tailed girl wasn't a Namimori student for much longer than herself. (It could also be attributed to the younger Tanaka trying to be Mr. Sasagawa's Mini Me, though; that'd drive _anyone_ to be a sulking heap of killjoy, just to balance out the EXTREME-ness of it all.)

"Lisa."

Said blond paused, turning to her newfound kindred spirit, who seemed to have stopped dead in her tracks. And was freaking out. "Yes?"

"In front…"

"You're gonna have to be more specific than that; we're at the very back of this merry band."

"Naomi's sister…"

"Yeah, what abou-?" Lisa's eyes widened at the sight, horror washing over her system. "Oh."

Fujiko Yoko has apparently decided that hitting on Mr. Xanxus was a good idea.

Then he got upset with her.

Then Decimo tried to stop Mr. Xanxus from killing her.

Then Lisa and Miss. Tanaka decided it was a good idea to run away before everything went to hell.

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**So, yeah. Lisa/Megumi friendship. 'n_n**

**I'mma listen to your requests on what the characters should wear, and maybe make an omake about it. ;]**


	28. Rumors

**Deciding what's an omake and what's not's getting annoying, so just consider everything but the specials a normal chapter. I'm ditching the theme naming 'cause it's being a pain in the butt. :L**

**Also, I've recently started a Naruto yokai!AU fic, but this is still my top priority! ;^;**

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_**Chapter 28:**_ Rumors

Lisa stared at Megumi incredulously, eyes wide and sandwich forgotten. "Seriously?"

The other girl sighed, taking a bite out of her rice ball. "Yup."

Kanna poked at her onigiri with her chopsticks, nodding absently. Her lunch was far more interesting than a discussion of the latest idiotic rumor, apparently. "Seaweed is the food of the devil…"

"But why? In the name of all that is holy, _why_ would anyone believe _Hibari I will bite you to death Kyoya_ wouldn't hit girls?!" Naomi demanded in exasperated disbelief, flailing. "I'm both a girl and his little sister, and it took his mega moe crush giving him a talking to before he stopped beating the living daylights out of me whenever I did something that bothered him! Even _Namiko_ isn't this stupid!"

"It's probably a combination of how he's a bit more lenient lately and how girls are passive-aggressive instead of out-right violent most of the time, giving him less opportunities to hurt them." Megumi theorized. "He's fought with Upperclasswoman Adelheid before, though, and doesn't hesitate to go at it with Chrome whenever she provokes him," (Which is more often than you might think; the younger Fujiko sister didn't dub her Female Pineapple Guy for nothing, you know.) "So it's still pretty dumb."

"Quite frankly, I'd be insulted if he _didn't_ hit girls. No gender is better than another!"

"Naomi, you're not a super hero. Sit down." the blond deadpanned.

"Uh, right… Sorry…" The Japanese complied, scratching the back of her head sheepishly.

"There's also the rumor of Gokudera being the illegitimate child of a rich guy." Kanna piped up, not taking her eyes off her now taken apart sushi.

"And the one about Yamamoto's dad being some kinda swordsman…" The twintailed girl sighed forlornly at the thought of her crush; she realized she had no chance with the future Vongola Rain Guardian after paying a bit more attention to how he looks at Decimo, leaving the taste of bitter irony in her mouth.

The most energetic of the four deadpanned at the others. "Enma and Tsuna being mafia bosses is more likely than that. Go home, guys. You're drunk."

"Come to think of it, there _have _been some scary people hanging around Sawada…" Megumi shivered at the memory of the Hibari-like boy she'd met at the moe blob's house. "And a lot of weird people seem to like him an awful lot…"

The shortest-haired member of the group finally turned her attention to the others. "Have you guys ever heard of Vongola? Because I met a baby the other day saying Sawada's the next heir."

(And all throughout this exchange, Lisa was trying very hard not to burst out laughing. _M__anically_.)

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**Thank you to anyone who read/followed/favorited/reviewed! :D**

**Because everyone knows girl talk consists of discussing whether or not Bambi in human form is a mafia boss. XD**


	29. Christmas Special

**I AM SO SORRY FOR TAKING SO LONG! I just don't have any ideas… ;_;**

**100 reviews… Holy shit… I love you guys… ;_; *Explodes***

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_**Chapter 29/special 2: **_Christmas

Christmas was a time of merriment and happiness; everyone knew that.

So why, exactly, was Tsuna spending the midnight of Christmas Eve hiding behind a couch in his living room with his (sort of) adopted siblings, Mukuro, Fran, Chrome and a quietly-crying-and-probably-rethinking-her-entire-life Miss Altimari, while Ken, Chikusa and M.M hid at the doorway?

Apparently, the Kokuyo Gang wanted to catch Santa, but knew they most likely won't be getting anything (they were probably on the Naughty List, but no one in their right mind would give Mukuro coal) and so decided to camp out in his house instead, I-pin, Lambo and Fuuta thought it'd be fun, and Lisa was being paid by his mom to babysit them. Or Mukuro wanted a stealth expert, which being good at being ignored apparently made her. He wasn't too sure of the details.

_Santa isn't even real…_ he internally complained.

And then a fat man in a red suit entered through the window (they didn't have a chimney) and walked over to the Christmas tree.

Tsuna blinked owlishly as his friends jumped Santa Clause. _I stand corrected._

It took less than a minute for the apparently-very-real old man to be subdued, held down by Fran and Chrome's illusions.

"This is wrong on so many levels…" the Italian girl mumbled from beside him as they watched Mukuro look down on the mythological being. He found himself agreeing with her.

"Kufufufu… If it isn't Mr. Clause…" his Mist Guardian chuckled darkly. "Tell me: How do you visit every house around the world in one night?"

"At least you're not trying to beat me to death…" Santa grumbled irritable, then shivered. "Stupid hellspwan…"

* * *

Hibari Kyoya sneezed in his sleep.

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**Thanks to anyone who read/followed/favorited/reviewed! :D**

**I'm really, really sorry it was so short… |||OTL**


	30. IMPORTANT

**Hey... So basically, I've realized this fic is kinda... bad. At least later chapters, anyway. I may pick it up again at some point and delete the stuff I dislike, but for now, I'll be focusing on other stuff. I don't dislike the concept, but my execution was less than acceptable.**

**So yeah. I'm really, REALLY sorry for leaving you hanging for so long; it took me a while to decide on what to do.**


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